When Love Comes From Hate
by Tarkaneea
Summary: How did the Perfect Ms. Lily Evans finally fall for Notorious Prankster James Potter? How did he finally win her over? This is my take on a classic... T, just in case... Song-fic at times... Please R & R
1. Butting Heads

**A/N: I'm just a desperate little writer begging to be known... and begging for reviews... R & R!**

**Disclaimer: Sadly, I don't own any of it that you recognize… **Wipes away a tear****

**Chapter 1: Butting Heads**

"Lily! What's taking so long?" Ugh, my best friend, Sara, was getting on my nerves. She meant well, but it was bloody annoying.

"Shut up, Sara…" I let my voice trail off, as I stared across the platform.

"What?" She noticed him too, "I knew it was only a matter of time," she said with a snicker, "You two were made for each other."

"I know; he's kind, considerate, not to mention: HOT!"

"Just think, four months ago you were sent into a fit of rage every time you saw him."

"What? Who are _you_ talking about?" All I could think about was Andy West. With his dark hair and piercing hazel eyes and intelligence most boys could only dream of.

"Girl, you know who I'm talking about. He's been pinning for you for years."

"What? I'm sure he doesn't even know I exist, let alone like me." I sighed, depressed.

"James Potter sure knows you exist, he's been practically drooling since he first laid eyes on you, first year." I stared at her in shock.

"James Potter?" I managed to stutter after I had finished gagging. "You think that I'm talking about _James Potter_? You disgust me!"

"Now now, Evans, no need to shout." That idiot actually had the nerve to come talk to me? What a jerk!

"Go to Hell Potter. It'll get you away from me." Then I noticed a badge on his chest. My face fell. "Oh. My. GOSH! How did _you_, the biggest arse in the school, except for maybe Sirius," Sara's face paled, "get to be _HEAD BOY_? Has Dumbledore lost his mind?

"You're having a similar reaction to my own, Sirius', Remus', and Peter's. It is actually slightly funny."

"Bloody Hell, Potter! I don't care about you or your idiotic friends! You're just a bunch of spoiled teenage boys who think you are better than everyone else! You know what? I think you're pathetic! PATHETIC! I would feel sorry for you if you weren't so fat-headed! You are one of those people who think the world should bow at your feet. You think that they should be at your beck and call at every moment of everyday. Now get out of my sight." I made a shooing gesture.

He smirked, "Sorry, no can do, Evans. You see McGonagall told me to come get you."

I cursed under my breath, causing a few surprised students to look my way. The Head Girl cursing wasn't something you saw every day. If McGonagall wants me, I'll go. Maybe it'll get Potter away from me for a while. At least until the Prefect meeting. "Fine. As long as you go away, Potter, I'll do what you want." I snarled.

"No, no, no… she wants both of us." I could hear him smiling, even though I was already stomping angrily away. All of my previous thoughts of Andy West were driven from my mind.

I was sitting in a slightly uncomfortable armchair in the teacher's compartment. I had been stolen away from my friends and was half listening to McGonagall rant about how Gryffindor is much better than the other tree houses because both Head Boy & Girl are in Gryffindor. Or something like that.

"You know… I think Remus would've made a better Head Boy." I said absent-mindedly, completely interrupting McGonagall. "I mean, as far as the Marauders go, he has the smallest ego… other than Peter, but Peter doesn't really count. Remus still has a bigger ego than most of the students, but by far smaller than Potter or Black. And at least he has leadership ability, _off the Quidditch Pitch_." Both of them stared at me, I glanced up, suddenly embarrassed. "Sorry, did I say that out loud?" Potter looked at me like I was crazy, but Hey! Maybe I am!

McGonagall was speechless, which was funny, because I'd never seen McGonagall speechless before. It was really quite disturbing. "Um… well… I suppose I should let you get to the Prefects meeting. Remember, you have to set up the patrol schedule, decide whether or not you want any school functions, which I would advise against, by the way, and make up each of the House's Common Room passwords for the next month. I snuck a glance at Potter who had a face similar to the one that I knew was on my own face. We were both try and failing to suppress our delight. "Any Questions?"

"None from me, Madam. Lilian?" Potter smirked. Typical.

"Thank you for your time, Professor, it helped tremendously." I said, completely ignoring Potter and his use of one of his many nicknames for me. I stood up, and walked out of the compartment without another word.

"You know, Evans, you don't have to be so mean." Potter said coolly, after we were out of earshot.

"You know, Potter, you don't have to be so arrogant." I replied effortlessly. After six years of dealing with him, I've come to think about my responses very deeply… they all have hidden meanings. Meanings, Potter has never been able to figure out, I might add. I kept walking.

"Lilyflower!" Oh no. Why does the world hate me? I have to deal with Potter & Black? _Together?_ Just kill me now.

"Shove off, Black. I'm not in the mood for your antics. I already have to deal with his." I added jerking my thumb at Potter.

"I feel your pain, Lilyflower. Jamsie here can be quite annoying at times."

"I think I might have to agree with you there, although, he's a little more than annoying sometimes."

"Yeah, I remember one time when—"

"SURIUS!"

"Yes, Jamsie?"

"Will you shut up? Please?"

"But Jamsie," Sirius whined, "I don't want to!" It was all I could do, not to laugh.

Potter glared at Sirius once more before turning back to me. He seemed to collect himself before calmly telling me: "We should hurry; we don't want the Prefects to think that their Heads are irresponsible." And with that, he headed down the corridor.

I turned to Sirius, who said, "Just between us, I think one of the heads is irresponsible, and it's not you." He winked at me and sauntered off in the opposite direction of Potter he probably went to find Peter or something.

When I walked into the Prefects meeting compartment, I was met with a shock. Potter actually talking with someone other than one of his friends, and surprisingly, it wasn't even a Gryffindor. _Wow_, I thought to myself, _Potter's really stepping out of his comfort zone, reaching out to the other Houses._

"Hello, Lily." I jumped involuntarily.

"What? Oh! Hi, Remus, what's up?" Remus was by far the smartest of the four Marauders. He's probably the only one of them to pass at least 80% of his OWLs.

"Not much. You looked distracted, is all. How'd the Heads meeting go with James?" He asked conversationally.

I glared at him. "Don't mention his name. I swear he's the spawn of the devil or something." I glanced at the spot where he had been only to find him gone.

"Boo."

I jumped, surprised by the sudden voice in my ear. I turned to glare at him. "I swear, if you do anything, I'll kill you! UGH!"

By now, pretty much the entire compartment was silent.

"Evans, Evans. I know you don't like me, but can you please try to set your stereotypical prejudices aside so we can _work_?"

I glowered at him. "I'm a stereotypical prejudice? What about you? You think that I should automatically adore you because you're the Quidditch Hero—"

"Evans." Potter whispered.

"–or because your family's rich! Newsflash buddy! I don't!—"

"_Evans_." He said, a little louder, and I pretended I didn't hear him.

"-I could care less about your pathetic Quidditch reputation, or your fancy family. I think you're just another loser who is trying to make himself look better than he really is. You're—"

"That's enough Evans."

"YOU'RE A BLOODY COWARD!"

"Well," Potter turned to Remus casually, who raised his eyebrows. "Didn't see _that_ one coming." He glanced at me again before walking towards one end the table. "Now that Evans has shouted at me for, what the third time today, I think that we should this meeting started." He clapped his hands, and everyone, even me—although grudgingly—sat down.

They formed groups of two for patrol, most of them where in their houses & years, but some ventured out and chose partners from other houses. They decided not to have any school functions, because Professor Slughorn was holding even more parties than usual. And were on to the last bit of business—

"We need to figure out when and where the weekly meetings will be." I spoke up for the first time since the meeting started.

"How about Mondays? In the Great Hall?" _Hufflepuff._

"No, too early in the week, and the Great Hall is always too crowded." _Gryffindor._

"Fridays? Library?" _Ravenclaw._

"Quidditch practice is on Fridays, and why would anyone want to spend more than the required time in the library than to do homework? Oh right, a pathetic book worm." _Do I even need to try and guess?_

"We'll compromise," I said. Wednesdays, 7:00, in the empty classroom on the first floor, the one by the central staircase. Dismissed."

Everyone walked out of the compartment except Remus and Potter. Potter was doing some paperwork and—wait, Potter and paperwork? I shook my head to make sure I wasn't dreaming.

"Uh, Lily?"

"Yeah Remus?"

"I was wondering why you suddenly had the idea of the empty classroom. You do know that Sirius makes out there a lot, right?" I heard Potter snicker.

"Ew! Now you got a gross image stuck in my head! Gross! I'm going to have to give you a detention now, Mr. Lupin. You have to do my paperwork for the next 15 seconds." He just stared at me like I was crazy. "What? It was worth a shot." Then I noticed he was trying not to smile. I smacked him playfully on the shoulder. "Now you're just making fun of me!" Potter grunted.

"And why on Earth would I do that Ms. Evans?" He smirked.

"How should I know what goes through a male's mind? Let alone a seventeen-year-olds." I replied lightly.

"You know, I think it would do you some good to get out of the Library sometime, you know, have some fun."

I raised my eyebrows at him. "Is that a dare, Mr. Lupin?" He started collecting his things.

"It's whatever you think it is, Ms. Evans." He winked at me, "See you at the feast, Lily." He nodded goodbye to Potter, and walked out of the compartment.

Potter and I sat in silence for a good ten minutes, filling out paperwork, reading files, and making notes. I glanced up and saw he was staring out the window. "Potter?"

"Hm? What? Oh, sorry. I'll just get back to work now."

"It looks like you're done."

"Oh. Right. I'll go now." He started fumbling with his papers. He stood up, and headed for the door.

"Wait!" He actually looked surprised that I was asking him to stop. I was a bit surprised myself. "We still need to make up passwords for the houses." He got a very mischievous look on his face that I would be worried about; if I wasn't so sure I had one on my own face.

"We should have a really hard one for Slytherin." He said sitting back down.

"," I said. He stared at me. "What? It's the longest word in the English language!" He looked suspicious," Seriously!"

"Only you, Evans. Only you would know that." He thought about it, and then looked at me through the corner of his eye. "Done. What does that even mean?"

"It's a lung disease caused by the inhalation of very fine silica dust, causing inflammation in the lungs. A condition meeting the word's definition is normally called silicosis."

"Well, I think that's brilliant. Now, we should have a really insulting one for Hufflepuff. Something like, Barmpot." (**A/N: Barmpot **_**n**_** clumsy idiot**)

I burst out laughing. "YES! Totally! We _have_ to do that one!" Did I really just laugh at something Potter said? That's new. Potter looked equally surprised by my reaction, but he was smiling himself.

"Well, well, well. Is Ms. Head Girl Lily Evans, sanctioning vulgar language in students?" He attempted a stern voice, which succeeded in making me laugh even harder.

"Uh, Ravenclaw." I said after I had regained control of my body, ignoring his question. "Um, they should have some random difficult questions to answer."

"Like—what's that one number thing muggles use for hard things? 6.24?" He was probably more confused than I was, but maybe not, I was pretty confused.

Then it dawned on me."Oh! Pi!"

"Pie?"

"No, Pi, P I. 3.14159265."

"I don't even want to know how you know that."

I giggled. Me! Lily Evans! GIGGLED! This is unheard of! "They have to give all those digits! Just like the Slytherin's have to pronounce it right!"

"You really are evil. Where did you learn it Ms Head Girl?"

I donned an evil look. "Nowhere? Gryffindor should be simple, but not simple enough for the other houses to get it. Like, like, like—The Deathly Hallows!"

His whole demeanor changed, not that I noticed it, I was too busy pacing around the room. "Do you know what that even means?"

"Not really, and I don't really care. It's easy, but not common. I found it in an old book in the restricted section."

"That explains it. Although it's kind of scary that you don't know what it means, and want to use it." He stated cautiously.

I noticed it now. "How is that scary?"

"Don't ask me to explain it. It just is." He said defensively.

I looked at him for a while. I got the feeling that he wasn't telling me everything, but decided to let him keep his secrets. "Okay. Do you want to use it or not?" I asked, an unintended sharpness lacing my voice.

"If you want to use it, fine, we can use it." He packed up his things again, and stood. He walked out the compartment door.

And this time, I didn't stop him.

**A/N: Not very good, but hey? Who can blame a girl for trying? ... Right? ...**

**Please R & R!**


	2. Staring & Smiling

**A/N: Here's chapter two… hope you like… please remember that I love you… R & R!**

**Disclaimer: I like so many others, have attempted to fill the shoes of the Great and Powerful Author of Awesomeness… And I, like so many others, have found that they're too big… **Sighs****

**Chapter 2: Staring & Smiling**

I sat in the compartment, my head swirling with mixed emotions. On one hand, I was overjoyed that I finally have the chance to get back at Sev, without technically breaking the rules. But on the other, I was concerned, or at least surprised, that Potter and I actually had a civil conversation. What has the world come to, when Potter and I talk, and I mean a real conversation, without getting angry at each other? Well, at least until the end there, that was depressing.

With my thoughts all in jumbled mess, I made my way through the train. I looked in most of the compartments along the way, looking for Sara, Kali and Alice. Without success, I might add. Where could they be? I checked everything but the Slytherin compartments, which, no sensible Gryffindor would enter, unless they were spying on the enemy of course.

It was almost dusk when I found them. They were in the most unreasonable place imaginable. With the Marauders. Oh, how I could have slaughtered them then and there. Although, I don't know who I was more

"Hello Lilyflower! How are you doing on this lovely, sparkling, enchanting evening, sweetheart?" Sirius was too happy for his own good. And I mean **_way_** too happy.

I glared at him. "Sirius, why don't you run along and go find another girl's heart to break, I'm sure there are some left who either don't know about, or don't care about you're 'reputation.'" Potter gave me a look that was something between admiration, hatred, and maybe a little fear. Sirius clutched his chest in mock hurt.

"Lilyflower! How could you hurt me like this?" I glared at him again. "I mean, did that night last year have no impact on your opinion of me? I'm heartbroken!" I gave him a look of pure revulsion. Potter looked confused. Remus rolled his eyes. Peter was asleep and drooling, as always. Kali and Alice were failing miserably in their attempt to hide their smirks. Sara was bewildered. Sirius, seeing everyone's reactions, quickly changed his demeanor. "Okay, maybe playing chess wouldn't affect your opinion of me, but it was worth a try… maybe…" He sat down, obviously disappointed. I shot the girls a look, _Is he going crazy? _I mouthed.Sara shrugged. Kali giggled. Alice nodded.

I burst out laughing. The Marauder's all looked confused, oblivious to our silent agreement. My outburst must have woken Peter up, because he was now looking utterly bewildered.

I looked around the compartment, searching for a place to sit. Unfortunately, the only spot was right next to Potter, and I mean 30 centimeters between him and the wall. He must have noticed me looking, because he attempted to make a little more room for me, and I reluctantly, sat down.

The eight of us sat in silence for a while, staring at each other. Remus broke the silence. "Geez Lily, why'd you have interrupt us," he said jokingly. I leaned forward, to look at him, around Potter.

"I'm _so_ sorry, Remus." I pulled out my girly voice. "I could leave if you would like." I batted my eyelashes playfully. Everyone else, minus Peter, who had surprisingly, or maybe not, fallen asleep, and was drooling again, busted out laughing.

I felt the edges of my mouth turn upwards, towards a smile. I glanced at Potter to find him staring at me with a grin upon his face, also. I found I couldn't look away. We sat there staring at each other, smiling.

* * *

Both of us where oblivious to the fact that Sara smacked Sirius on the leg, at which he yelped, and jerked her head at us. He notified Remus, while Sara showed Kali and Alice.

Peter chose that moment to wake up. "Hey James! What you staring at Evans for?" We were jerked back into reality when everyone else in the compartment started slapping him. "AHHHH!" He opened the door and ran out down the corridor.

I shoved Potter over. He looked at me, offended. "What? Peter's gone, so now Remus can scoot over, and so can you." I responded lightly.

He looked at me out of the corner of his eye. "What if I don't want to?" He said, in the same tone.

I rolled my eyes. "I'm not giving you a choice!" I pushed him harder. "Why do you have to be so strong! Ugh!" Everyone laughed at me as I fell off the seat.

"Looks like I'm getting a lot more room than I would've thought. Scoot over Remus, I need more room." Remus looked at Kali for help. She stood up and pushed Potter off the seat too.

"That's better," she said as she and Remus stretched out on the seat. He grinned.

"Okay, now this really isn't fair." I said grumpily, glaring at the pair.

"We both would still be sitting on a comfortable seat right now, if you hadn't been greedy…" Potter noted icily.

"Now it's my fault?" I defended bitterly.

"Yes." He replied simply.

I held back the retort that was on the tip of my tongue. I did not want to get into an argument with him right now. I couldn't think straight. I needed fresh air. "I'm going for a walk." I got up, stepped over Potter, and walked out of the compartment.

* * *

In Fifth year, after having an extreme 'disagreement' with Potter, I'd discovered that there was an open balcony at the end of the train. I went there. I needed to be alone with my thoughts.

I don't know when I realized I didn't hate him anymore. I don't know when I started to enjoy his company. I don't know why I'd suddenly thought of him as a friend.

Why did he have to change? Why couldn't he have stayed the arrogant, annoying prick who asked me out every five minutes? At least then, I knew what to expect of him. Now, I have no idea what he's going to do next. He's totally unpredictable. It's unsettling.

I looked around and saw that we were maybe 2 minutes from Hogsmeade Station. I took some deep breaths and went back inside, preparing for a night in hell.

* * *

"Firs' Years!" I heard Hagrid call. "Gather 'round, Firs' Years!" He smiled and waved me over.

I walked up to him. "I don't have to help you get the First Years up to the castle do I?" I asked jokingly.

"No, jus' wan'ed ta see a friendly face for a while." He smiled. Hagrid was a, well, let's just say he's a… _big_ man. Intimidating to say the least. In First Year, I was so scared of him; it wasn't until Sara told me her brother said he was really nice that I walked up to him. He got on my 'friends list' when he told off Potter for almost pushing me into the Black Lake while we were on the boats.

"Have fun," I said with a smirk. "I need to get up to the castle. See you around, Hagrid."

"Bye Li'y."

* * *

Whenever I was yelling at Potter, I always felt a deep sense of completion. I never knew why. When I told Alice about it in Fourth year, she said "Maybe it's because it's your goal in life to make his a living hell." I replied with a simple shrug and a slight nod of the head, wondering why I was stressing myself over this.

For some reason, that memory came rushing back to me as I saw Potter helping a little Third Year get the mud off her robes after a boy pushed her down. She smiled at him and ran off to join her friends in the carriages. "Kind of reminds you of us, don't you think?" I asked as I walked up to him.

"What?"

"Remember, in Second Year," I prompted, "You pushed me into the lake, well, Sirius pushed me into the lake, you just laughed."

"Oh! Right. I totally forgot all about that day. That year!" He sounded a little exasperated.

"You okay?"

"Huh, oh, yeah, I'm fine." I wasn't convinced, I raised my eyebrows, as if to say _really? _"Seriously Evans, I'm fine!" He stalked away.

Wow, I thought. That's new. Usually it's me stalking away from our conversations, but he's done it twice in the last day! I never, in my wildest dreams, would have imagined it. I sighed, and walked over to my friends, who, to my great relief, had freed themselves from the hands of the evil Marauders. I went over to where they were standing while waiting for a carriage that could hold all four of us.

"Well, that was awkward." We all looked at Alice with confused expressions. "What?"

"Alice, sweetheart, _you're_ awkward." Alice glared at Sara, while Kali and I burst out laughing.

"I'll show you awkward" Alice said, trying to sound threatening, which, coming from her, was just plain pitiful.

"Al," I said politically, "you can't threaten someone. It always backfires in your face. Or it just simply doesn't work."

"I'll take the latter!" Sara mocked.

"Uh, Lil, I don't think your last sentence was proper English." Kali stated simply. "Just and simply can mean the same thing."

"Uh, Kal," I imitated her, "I don't really care about my grammar. Unless I'm talking to a teacher, writing an essay, or trying to sound smart, I don't use proper English. And I don't care either."

"Well, that wasn't insulting."

"Glad we both agree on that then!" Sara and Alice shared a perplexed look.

"Oh, look!" Alice interrupted the staring match between Kali and I, "The carriage is here!"

I saw who was in the carriage and immediately stopped, grabbed Sara's arm and pulled her back. "We're not going on that carriage!" I whispered urgently. She glanced up at the cart, I saw understanding dawn on her face.

"Lil, you're gonna have to face him sooner or later, why not now? Why not get it over with now?"

"Sar, unless you've gone completely blind, you'll notice that in that carriage, is my HUGE crush. The one person, I CAN'T TALK TO!"

"Well, I guess you're just gonna have to wait here, all by yourself, 'cause I'm not waiting with you. Wait, no! Not by yourself, you can wait with Potter! They're coming up the lane right behind you!" I glanced over my shoulder, and saw she was telling the truth. Potter was in an adamant conversation with Remus, while Sirius was trying to get Peter to do something.

"Oh God, let's go." I heard her snicker.

"What took you guys so long?" Kali asked once we had sat down in the carriage.

"Oh, Lily suddenly had something to tell me, but I told her to wait until we were in the carriage, but she insisted on telling me right there." Sara smoothly covered up our entire conversation.

"What'd you tell her?" Alice asked.

"Funny you ask, Al, right as I was about to tell her, she told me Potter and his band of thugs, were coming up behind me, so we made a beeline for the carriage. And I totally forget what I was trying to say." I pretended to try and think hard.

They shrugged it off as reasonable, and soon started discussing who they thought the new Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher was. _Thanks, _I mouthed to Sara. She nodded in reply, and joined Kali and Alice's conversation.

Every year we've been at Hogwarts, there has been a new DADA teacher, unfailing. Every year, the teacher was attacked, ridiculed, became suddenly ill, turned out to be a Vampire, the list goes on and on. When I asked Professor McGonagall about it, she said that for over 20 years, they haven't had a DADA teacher last more than a year.

They hoped that we would have someone younger than last year. Professor Kinderfeild, who was, like, 80, suddenly, during our class, dropped dead from a heart attack. It was all very sad, but no one really liked him, so it wasn't too depressing. The only thing that really creeped anyone out, was the fact that now, pretty much the entire 7th year could see the thestrals.  
Thestrals are bony, demented, unicorn-ish-looking horses. You have to see someone die to be able to see thestrals, so everyone thinks they're evil. But they're not. Unless you threaten them, they'll walk up to you and nuzzle you. They're very funny.

After I'd seen my mum die the summer before third year, I'd discovered that I could see them. Curious, I asked Hagrid about them, he told me he had raised an entire herd of the creatures. Later that year he showed them to me. Now, every once in a while, I go and visit them. No one ever knows that it's there that I go, because no one but Hagrid knows that I know where they nest.

I was so lost in thought, that I didn't realize that Alice, who was sitting next to me, was elbowing me in the side. When I looked up to glare at her, she nodded towards the other end of the carriage. I followed her eyes and saw that he was staring at me. THE one. The only person in the world who could quite possibly be perfect. Andy West, was staring at me. I was shocked. Before I realized what I was doing, I was smiling. Ugh! Why is life doing this to me! Suddenly embarrassed, I looked down at my feet, which were suddenly very interesting.

Out of the corner of my eye, I saw the wheels of mischief turning in Sara's head. Crap, that can't be good.

"Hey Andy," I heard her say. Crap. Why is she doing this? "I was just wondering what you thought was so interesting about Lily's Robes. They're the same as everyone else's."

Bulls-eye. Only Sara could make someone like Andy squirm in his seat like that.

"Uh, um. Well, it's just, I, um. Sorry." He mumbled, and stopped trying to dig himself out of a hole that he kept digging himself deeper into. I tried to stifle my chuckle. Needless to say, it didn't work.

"You have something to add Lil?" Sara asked me. Dang! I never knew she could be so professional.

"No. I think you pretty much covered everything." I somehow pulled off my superior, Head Girl Voice. You know, the one that makes the younger students cower in fear and the older ones do what I say. Yeah. It's pretty awesome.

I saw Andy shrink back.

I found myself leaning back and making myself more comfortable. I smiled, and thought despite how crazy the day had been, it had been fun.

Yep. This is going to be a good year. I mean a _really_ good year.

**A/N: Well, um… I had fun writing this one. Is Lily playing 2 guys? Oooh… bad girl. **

**Please review… I'll love you forever, and ever, and ever, if you do… **


	3. Mudblood's Win

A/N: Thanks to everyone who reviewed and added to the Story Alert. It really made my day. Remember that I love you all. R & R please and thank you.

**Oh, and to NuttyKujo (or is it KujoNutty? Sorry I don't remember) Yes. I will now love you forever and ever and ever… **

**Now without further ado, here is the third chapter!**

**Chapter 3: Mudblood's Win**

On the way to the castle, it started raining, no… _pouring. _We were all huddled together in a little sphere of warmth. Until I got smart and put a charm on the carriage, making it so no water could come in. I extracted myself from the huddle and dried my clothes and hair with a charm. My friends stayed huddled for another 5 minutes until they realized that they were drying off. They all looked at me, angry. I smiled cheekily, and motioned for them to sit down.

I hadn't bothered to dry off the floor, so there was a huge puddle. Alice soon figured that out, by slipping. Falling. Screaming. Yelling at Kali for help. And landing. In the mud. Outside the carriage.

I scrambled up to the front of the carriage, and whispered into the thestral's ear. "Go faster," I said hurriedly. I glanced back and saw Alice on the ground, glaring at me. I swear, if looks could kill, I'd be dead. But luckily, they can't, so I'm not.

I'll relish this moment forever, I thought. The day, I, Lily Evans, made my friend fall out of a carriage, in the rain. And tried to leave her there. I would probably be killed after the feast, but hey! It was fun while it lasted.

Andy was staring at me again. This time it was like I was crazy. I leaned over to him. "I know what you're thinking. And yes, we are crazy. We were checked by psychiatrists in London. They said it was quite obvious." I said very seriously.

"Really? I would never have guessed." He replied. Surprisingly, he had a smile on his face.

"I never knew it was obvious." I sighed, looked down at Sara and Kali trying to help Alice. "I should go help them." I jumped down, immediately feeling my feet sink deep into the mud. Gross. I spelled the mud and made it dry. Not realizing that I did it while my feet were still incarcerated. "Crap," I muttered. Then yelled "FIRE IN THE HOLE!" I saw my friends dive away. Seeing that the coast was clear, I looked away and shot a reducto spell at the mud at my feet, successfully blasting away a good majority of the mud by my feet.

"Wow." I heard Andy say. His eyes bulging. I was about ready to respond when I got interrupted by Kali.

"LILS! Why'd you have to do that one! It's much less destructive than the other one!"

I don't know who Andy was more scared of. Me, who cast a complex and dangerous spell with no hesitation, Or Kali, who was disappointed in me for using the safer one.

"Oh look!" Sara clapped her hands together, trying to break the tension. "Our ride just left, and we have ten miles left to go. How _very_ depressing." Her voice not at all sounding like her words. Somehow, she managed to be cheerful, while talking about depressing things. She's not good at breaking tension. Nope. Not. At. All.

"Look on the bright side," Kali interjected. "It stopped raining." She cringed as the rest of us glared at her.

"What kind of bright side is that when you're SOAKING WET?" Alice screamed that last part directly in my face.

"Sorry?" I asked tentatively as I cast the spell to knock all the mud off of her and dry her off.

"Sorry? You bloody pushed me off the carriage!"

"Technically I-

"UGH! I Just- Sar, can I kill her?"

"Huh? Sure." Alice had a look of pure villainous on her face. "Wait, what did I just agree to?"

"Li-lee!" She called calmly, I might even call it sing-song. Not the kind of voice you would expect from a killer. "Where aarree you?" She sang. I was hiding behind Sara. "Hey, Andy! Where is she?" I heard her shout

"Honestly, I have no idea. I was too busy paying attention to the group of Slytherins standing over by the forest."

We all followed his eyes and sure enough, we all saw four greasy haired Seventh year boys with green badges on their chests walking towards us.

I stood up, walked around to my friends, and stepped up in front of them. I glared up at the Slytherins with my Head Girl do-what-I-say-or-die-glare. Snape had the decency to look away.

"What's this?" Avery sneered. "Is it Mudbloods stuck in, dare I say it, _the mud_?"

"Shut it, Avery." Sara, the only Pureblood of us, shot back.

"Oh, is the blood traitor trying to defend her friends? I personally would feel sorry for her friends. If they weren't so… Unworthy." Mulciber. The worst of all of them. He's evil _and_ he has talent. Snape has talent, but I wouldn't really consider him _evil._ Maybe. Not really. Yeah, I thought, he's evil.

"Leave." I stated flatly, continuing to glare at them. "You have no right to come here and insult my friends and I. If you have nothing productive to say to us, leave."

"Lils," Sev spoke up. I had a sudden wave of memories rush into my head. From the first time he met me, to the first time he called me a Mudblood. I felt a feeling of God knows what, pain, hurt, betrayal? "Lils, don't resist them."

"Resist what? Resist you're puny, miserable, pathetic idea of magic? Huh? Why would I need to resist that? You're incapable of hurting me. You know it, I know it. Everyone in the whole bloody wizarding world knows it." I was rambling, like I always do when I get wound up. But he was getting on my nerves. Well, he always gets on my nerves. He and Potter are alike in that sense. I'll have to tell Potter he's like his dear friend Snivellus. That would be a fun sight to see. "So. What are you and your cronies going to do to us? Insult us all day? Because we're hungry and would like to eat. If you're finished, we would like you to PISS OFF!" Then I remembered something else I wanted to tell him. "Oh, and Snivlly? Never call me Lils again. Only friends and acquaintances get to call me that. And seen as how you're neither. Stop."

"Dang." Lestrange said mockingly. "Yeah, I've seen her yell at Potter, but I never knew the Mudblood had so much fire. This'll be interesting to watch."

"Watch your mouth, Rudolf." Alice barked at him. She had used that name ever since first year, during to sorting. She had misheard McGonagall, and thought she said Rudolf, as in the reindeer. The name stuck. Now all of our friends and the Marauders call him Rudolf.

"Don't call me that, Mudblood," he seethed.

"I'll stop calling you Rudolf when you stop calling me Mudblood." She retorted.

"Now, now, Rodolphus. No need to argue with the little bugs. They can't do anything but annoy you." Avery drawled.

"I'll show you annoying." A deep voice that I couldn't quite make out called from behind us.

I turned around, as did all of my friends, looking for the source of the voice, but we saw nothing. I heard a grunt from behind me, the Slytherins. Sev and Avery were on the ground gasping for breath, Rudolf was looking around nervously. I saw Mulciber go to grab his wand out of his robes, but I heard a quite whisper, barely audible. "Expelliarmus." It said. I looked over to where I heard the voice and saw a bright red light shoot out at Mulciber, who had his wand went flying towards the woods.

Crap. I suddenly knew who it was. I looked at Rudolf just as he shot a Cruciatus Curse at my face.

I screamed. Then, everything went black.

* * *

"I still can't get over how you snuck up on us." I heard someone mutter in disbelief. I struggled to open my eyes to see who it was, but couldn't. I couldn't move a muscle. I was helpless.

"AL! SHUT UP!" Many voices mingled together.

"What? Why?" Alice replied

"You've said it at least twenty times in the last five minutes! That's why!" Another voice, a little distant.

I could tell now. I was being carried. Bridal Style. I was slightly cramped and uncomfortable, but I felt safe. "She can say whatever she wants to say. It's her right." The same deep voice from before, responded. I couldn't remember who it was. I knew I had figured it out before the curse hit me, but now, my minds' a jumbled mess.

I regained some feeling in my feet, but couldn't move them quite yet. The person carrying me shifted my slightly, which made me a little more comfortable. But only slightly.

"I hope she'll be all right." Someone said.

As if in response, a small moan escaped my lips. "Lily?" The deep voice called. So soft. Who could it be? I wondered. "Lily, are you all right?" Oh, just keep talking, I could listen all day. The voice was so silky and smooth… "Lily!"

"Lils!" some other voices called, the same time the velvety voice said my name again. I heard the sound of feet running. "Can you hear us?" someone asked. I moaned again. "I'll take that as a yes." I felt myself being lowered. Ewww, gross I was laid down in the mud.

At last! I could open my eyes. I saw four heads hovered above me. I recognized them as Alice, Sara, Kali, and Potter. "Wha-? What hap- happened? Wh- who died?" I spluttered. Potter smiled. I realized it was him who had the velvety, smooth voice. For some reason I wasn't disgusted like I should have been.

"I sure hope someone died." He told me darkly. Most likely thinking of the Slytherins.

"Whe- where is ever- everyone el- else?" I do not like spluttering. It makes me feel all helpless inside.

"Well," Kali began, "Andy went off running to the castle, and Sirius, Remus, and Peter stayed with those worthless Slytherins to make sure they didn't try anything on anyone else."

"Wow." Sara muttered. "Did you really just say that in one breath?"

"I think so." Sara looked at her with a look somewhere between respect and shock.

"Uh, guys," Alice interjected, "I think you're confusing Lils." The pair looked at me like they'd forgotten I was there.

"Whe- Where ar- are we?"

"We're about six or seven miles from the castle. I'm hoping West has gotten to the castle by and told the faculty. Help will come soon."

"Wh- why di- didn't we ta- take the carr- carriage?" I asked.

"It ran off, remember Lils?" Sara scolded.

"No," I said. "Yo- yours," I nodded towards Potter.

"We didn't have one." When I looked at him quizzically, he added, "Thestrals don't like Remus." Realization dawned on me. Thestrals must not like Werewolves.

"Po- Poor Remus." I tried to sound solemn, but ended up only sounding half dead.

"Hey, Lils?" Kali started to ask, "Can you try not croaking? You're sounding like Peter." Everyone laughed at this, I attempted to, but it caused a coughing fit. My friends gave me worried looks, which were soothed once my fit was over.

"So- sorry." I took a deep breath. "Do you think we," another breath, "should keep going?" I was amazed at how well that worked.

"Can you walk yet?" Sarah asked.

A deep breath, "I don't think so." I shot Potter an apoplectic look, who sighed and picked me up again.

"Oh, come on Potter, we all know you're stronger than that! You big baby." Sara half scolded, half teased. Everyone knew Potter Potter was one of the strongest guys in school.

He acted hurt, "I'm hurt Syrten. I really am." Everyone laughed but me this time; I didn't want another coughing attack. "Lily, can you ride piggy-back this time? My back is killing me."

"I think that'll be more… comfortable for the… both of us." I said, taking multiple breaths. A sudden pain in my ankle surprised me. I gasped. "But I think… my ankle is… either broken…. or sprained."

"Seriously? Oh crap, you must have fallen on it. I'm sorry, I didn't realize. Do any of you know how to help with that?" He asked the other three.

"Are you really asking me? The complete magical idiot?" Sara looked offended.

Alice gave a _Don't-look-at-me!-She's-even-better-than-I-am!_ look.

"I know how, but I don't trust myself to be able to do it right." Kali sighed.

"Let's just get… moving. Madam Pomfrey… can fix it once… we get to… the castle." I said, ignoring Potter' look of dismay.

"Fine," he muttered.

After he stood up, Alice and Kali helped me up on his back, while Sarah looked on with a bemused expression.

We walked about 3 minutes in silence, the only sounds were our feet sloshing through the mud, and the occasional sound from the woods. Then, I saw Sara whispering urgently with Alice, beckoning Kali over, and all three of them bursting out laughing. I looked down at Potter, who looked up at me, as confused as I was. I rolled my eyes, and he gave me a _they're-your-friends_ look. I rolled my eyes again.

Suddenly Sara broke out singing.

_"I'm going out tonight-I'm feelin' alright_  
_Gonna let it all hang out_  
_Wanna make some noise-really raise my voice_  
_Yeah, I wanna scream and shout_  
_No inhibitions-make no conditions_  
_Get a little outta line_  
_I ain't gonna act politically correct_  
_I only wanna have a good time"_

Alice and Kali joined her on the chorus. I was laughing so hard, my sides hurt more than my ankle. And, by the way I was moving up and down, Potter thought it was funny too. Eventually, we both joined in too.

It was fun, just walking through the woods at night, the moon low on the horizon, singing together. We girls knew a lot of songs, as we had all gone to a Shania Twain concert, back in the summer before Fifth Year. Kali's older sister had planned on taking her best friends, but something had come up, so she gave the ticket to us. It was awesome.

Potter, on the other hand, knew none of the songs we were singing; I wouldn't expect him to, since they were Muggle songs, sung by a female singer. He ended up only singing a few of the chorus'. Then he started singing one of his own. Which was okay, except that it was by Styx. Which just happened to be Kali's favorite Artist. We all saw her eyes go wide, in shock and l knew she was amazed.

"I don't think she thought you knew any Muggle song. Let alone one by her favorite artist." I whispered in his ear, as he was finishing the first verse. Kali had made us learn all of her favorite songs by Styx, so we knew a majority of them by heart.

We all sang the entire song. All of us were off key, we were absolutely terrible, except for Potter, who was surprisingly good. Us girls were slightly put down at how much better at it then we were.

"Dang, Potter," Kali said to him after the song was over. "You can sing my song. And you can sing it well. Where have you been all my life?" We all could tell she was joking, and laughed.

Suddenly, we were surrounded by teachers and faculty. It was so sudden, in fact, that I almost fell off Potter's back.

Madam Pomfrey instructed Potter to put me down, gently, if he valued his sanity. He glanced up and saw the horror on my face, grinned and left me in the clutches of the School's Healer.

Silently cursing Potter, I told Madam Pomfrey exactly what happened. She put me on a hovering cot, bed thingy. She told me that my ankle was broken, my foot was practically shattered, and my femur was fractured. She said I was lucky I couldn't feel anything.

"I can't feel anything down there, because my head hurts so bad I can't even think!" She stared at me, looked in her bag, and gave me a chocolate frog. "Shouldn't you be encouraging healthy eating habits?" She glared at me. "Hey, I never said I wouldn't eat it." Sighing, I ripped the box apart. First, I bit the head off. Oh, the savory delightfulness. I took another bite and another and then, I sighed again. My chocolate frog was gone.

And so was my headache. It was just a distant memory. Madam Pomfrey looked at me knowingly. "Is it gone yet?" she asked. Nervously, I nodded. "Good. Let's get you up to the castle." With that, I was bustled away.

* * *

**A/N: At times while writing this, I had to go back and think, is this reasonable? The answer to a good majority was… nope… But, still. I hope you liked it. **

**I know… Sara's last name sucks… but I'm not good with names… Any ideas for Alice or Kali's?**

**Oh, and Shania Twain and Styx were just some random artists from that era… I think?**

**With love, **

**Tark**


	4. Damning the Damned

**A/N: I really love it when you guys review… It makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside… So why don't more of you review? It'll get the chapter's up faster… Believe me… I write a lot faster when I know my reader's care! Which is why I don't write very fast for school… The reader's don't care! **

**Thanks again to Kujo… No Nutty this time? *Insert Sad Face* Amazing review… You always make me laugh… **

**And mucho gracias (es?) to ****AliLuvsAlli-Sirius****. Your idea for Kali's last name was TREMENDOUS! How did I ever live without you? **

**Sorry for the delay… my life has been pretty hectic lately… Basketball, jammed finger, BOB (Battle of the Books), and so much more… it's only because of a snow day, and a half, that I go this to you…**

**You're all probably begging me to shut up… *Insert Dramatic Sigh* so here's chapter 4…**

**Disclaimer: I am not awesomeness incarnate... therefore I am not J.K. Rowling... sorry to burst your bubble...  
**

**Chapter 4: Damning the Damned**

Damn Madam Pomfrey. Damn James Potter. Damn Rudolf Lestrange. Damn Severus Snape. Anyone else I would like to damn today? Nope. At the present, I'm quite pleased with damning those four. Well, I could add Mulciber and Avery, and maybe Potter doesn't deserved to be damned. Possibly. I mean, he did carry me what, 6, 7 miles? 2 or 3 bridal style, and the rest piggy-back. So yeah, I guess he doesn't deserve to be damned. But I never will forgive him for leaving me in the hands of Madam Pomfrey. Never. Never, while I still live and breathe.

The other three, or five deserved it. A lot. I'll get the Slytherins back. And back hard. Soon, very soon. Yes. I'll-

"Ah, Miss Evans. It's so good to see you again." Dumbledore, the Headmaster of Hogwarts, strode into the Hospital Wing interrupting my hate-filled thoughts, his robes billowing behind him. "Now, as my Head Girl, it is you're responsibility to keep yourself out of this room." He said with a twinkle in his eye, giving away the fact that he was joking.

"I'm sorry Professor, it's not my fault," I joked, then hesitated, "I think."

"It's quite alright, my girl, quite alright. Although, if I do say so myself, you missed a very scrumptious feast tonight, the house elves really out-did themselves this time."

"Well then, I guess it's a good thing my appetite disappeared with my legs isn't it?" I told him playfully.

"Yes, I suppose it is." His face took a more serious tone. "Now, if Mr. Potter wou-" Apparently, either Potter makes a habit of listening in on conversations, or he just has good timing, because as soon as the Headmaster mentioned his name, he came in. He smirked at me, which I returned with a glare, I'll get him back for leaving me with Madam Pomfrey. "I guess we can start now. Now, I need to know if you decided on any school functions." He seemed to remember something, "Oh, and Mr. Potter, did you tell the Prefect's what their house password were?"

"Yes sir, I had to repeat the Slytherins quite a few times for them to understand what I was saying. They seemed to think I was playing a prank on them. I wouldn't have the slightest idea why though. It's quite confusing." I snorted, and he gave me an _I-told-you-so_ kind of look.

"For your information Potter, if you don't remember that far back, it was me who came up with their password." I saw Professor Dumbledore raise his eyebrows.

"And what, may I ask, would that password be?"

Potter and I glanced nervously at each other, "Um, Professor? Do you really want me to repeat it? _Again_?"

"Why wouldn't you like to repeat it? _Again_?" Dumbledore mocked him.

"Um, because, well, it's um, the longest word in the English language?" I began to tell him. Then Potter joined me in saying. "," Then I continued, "It's a lung disease caused by the inhalation of very fine silica dust, causing inflammation in the lungs. A condition meeting the word's definition is normally called silicosis."

"If it were any two other students who did that, I would be very, very disappointed. But, since it was you two, who've felt dear loss, discrimination, and pain from many of the Slytherins, I feel that you have the right to lash out at them, in any way you seem reasonable. And, I must say, Miss Evans that was very creative of you." I smiled nervously. Thinking again for the third time that day, about the time when I was hurt so badly by Sev. He'll never understand how betrayed I felt that day. How betrayed I'll always feel. I noticed that the Headmaster was talking again. "-and I'll assume that I do not wish to know the other passwords." We both nodded vigorously, while trying to hold back our smiles.

"Okay, on to more pressing matters. As I mentioned before, I need to know if you and the Prefect's decided on any school functions."

"We decided-" Potter interrupted me. Okay, maybe I will damn him.

"We had originally decided, with the Prefects, to not do anything. But something that happened on the trip up here, made me think of something, that I think students and staff will enjoy." I looked at him with a mixture of apprehensiveness and horror.

"Yes, my boy?" Dumbledore prompted.

"We should have a talent show. School-wide. Anyone who wishes to enter, can. No restrictions, except, no magic is allowed." He gave us a little time to let it sink in. A talent show. Hmm. _A talent show?_ Really? Could it work? I mean, there's always the biased, popularity vote to consider. The underdog _never_ wins.

"How would you get around the popularity contestants?"

"The what?"

"The contestants who only enter to win the prize, because they know that, because they're so popular, or rich, or something, they'll be guaranteed a spot in the winner's circle."

"Oh, I never thought of that. Dang." He considered this for a moment. Then he smiled. "We could have the teachers pick the winners." He glanced at Professor Dumbledore eyes full of inquiry.

"Sounds like a plan. But the two of you will have to organize everything. And please, don't have it too soon, give everyone plenty of time to prepare. Mr. Potter, Miss Evans." With a mysterious, yet humorous glance at the two of us, he swept out of the room, and was gone.

"Hey Potter," I beckoned him over. "Come here"

"Why?" he asked nervously.

"My legs were broken, that's why." I told him.

"How exactly did they get broken?" he asked, walking over to my bed.

"Something, or someone must have fallen on them, because they were completely demolished."

"Yeah, Avery had fallen close to you, so it's possible that he might have landed on you. That could've caused your legs to break, but it wouldn't cause the damage you got. I honestly don't know what happened. Sorry." He said looking genuinely sorry. Why was he making this so hard?

"I've always wanted to do this, but never had a truly good reason to." I told him, and he looked scared? No. Apprehensive? Yes.

"Always wanted to do what?" He backed away.

"Come here and find out," I said him secretly.

He nervously walked back towards my bed. I beckoned him closer. He leaned in, still nervous. Then, SLAP! My hand trailing across his cheek as I slapped him. He jumped back and knocked a tray of empty cups to the floor.

"HOLY- What the _HELL_ was that for?"

"MR POTTER!" I heard a shout from the room where Madam Pomfrey slept. "WHAT DID YOU DO?" I winced. From all the movement, not her shouting. Shouting has absolutely no effect on me anymore. I don't know if that's a good thing or not.

"Wha-? Nothing! I swear! She did it to me!"

"I highly doubt a girl who has two broken legs could walk up and make that much noise. And, you're the one on the ground."

He argued. "But-! never mind." He mumbled.

"That's what I thought. Now, I'm going leave for a few minutes and when I get back, you had better be gone." With one last glare at Potter, she stalked back to her room.

"Okay, now, why, the HELL did you slap me?"

"That was fun." I giggled.

"No it was NOT!" He said pretty loud. Then glanced nervously at the door that the school nurse had just passed through. "Seriously Evans, why did you slap me?"

"Because, you stupid arse, you left me in the vile hands of the Wicked Witch of the West! That's why!" I whispered harshly.

"Are you serious?" He looked shocked. "That's why?"

"Yes, now leave." I was very stern.

"Fine," he stood up, glaring at me, and walked out of the room.

Thank God. I think?

* * *

"Crap," I muttered as I woke up. My head was blazing, my legs were aching, and my feet? Well, let's just say they were on fire.

"Ahh, Miss Evans, I see you're awake. You had fallen asleep by the time I had come back in to check on you." Oh, how do I hate that woman. "Are you feeling better?"

No, I feel worse than I did yesterday, I thought sarcastically, but I didn't say it out loud. "It really hurts, can you give me something to get me through the day?"

"What do you mean? You're going to be staying here for at least a week!"

I saw Kali sneak in behind Madam Pomfrey, and shot me a _she's-an-idiot_ look. If this woman thinks she can stop me from attending the first day of classes in my 7th year, she was sadly mistaken.

"Now look here woman," I snarled. "If you don't let me go to class, I will personally rip your throat out. I will NOT miss the first BLOODY DAY OF SCHOOL!" I heard a muffled giggle. Looking around the nurse, I saw that Kali had her hand over her mouth and had a look somewhere between sympathy, confusion, and amusement.

"Miss Evans! I do not allow of vulgar language in my infirmary! As you are not leaving anytime soon, I suggest you-what do you kids say these days?-shut up!" She glared at me, then at Kali who had giggled again.

"My dear Madam Pomfrey, I suggest you give me something for the pain or I'm going to have my friend here make me something." I angrily raised my eyebrows. So did Kali. Everyone, except for Madam Pomfrey apparently, knows that Kali is one of the worst Potion students in the world. As a result, Professor Slughorn hated her.

"Miss Taylor, will you please leave, Miss Evans and I are trying to having a conversation here." The nurse said not very nicely.

"No, Kal," I responded cheekily, "I think you should stay."

"MISS EVANS!" the she-devil's voice boomed. "DON'T YOU DARE SPEAK TO ME LIKE THAT AGAIN!"

"Madam Pomfrey. You will give me a draught fro the pain. You will conjure me up some crutches. And you will let me leave." I was all but growling at her. "Is that clear?" I asked her softly. She didn't respond. "IS THAT CLEAR?" I shouted so loud the windows shook.

Her eyes widened in terror as she shook her head in confirmation. "Good," I smiled, and stretched. Kali walked over to me as Madam Pomfrey literally ran out of the room.

"This day will go down in history." She muttered. I looked at her quizzically. "What? I don't think anyone has ever made that witch cry."

"I made her cry? Well, today might turn out better than I thought it would." I grinned at her, which she returned.

* * *

It didn't.

Turn out better, I mean. I had every single one of my classes with at least 2 of the Marauders. EVERY SINGLE ONE! Ugh, if I don't die by the evil hand of Madam Pomfrey, or Professor McGonagall, before the end of the year, I will certainly die by overexposure to those four. Well, that's not fair to Remus, or even Peter. I know Peter is a little, um, fat? But he's kind at heart. And Remus is awesome; he actually pays attention in class so he's cool.

But Potter and Black? Well, let's just say that those two are, well, perverts? No-well, Black is, Potter isn't-well, not anymore, that is. They're also idiots, and egocentric. Okay, both of them are idiots, I'll give you that much, but this year, even for just a few hours, I've gotten to know them a little better and, well, they're not egocentric anymore. It's like my whole idea of them just got turned on it's head. It's quite disconcerting.

But anyway, back to my schedule. I'm taking all the classes I would need to be either an Auror, or a healer. I still haven't decided which, so I figured I'd keep my options open.

I guess it's a good thing that I have all my classes with the girls. Well, all but one. None of them opted to continue taking Divination. I don't blame them, I just wanted to have a class where I could sleep. Other than History of Magic, of course.

"Come on Lily-Flower," Sirius whined, "It's only History of Magic notes! And it's only the first day!"

"Then you wouldn't care about going back to Professor Binns and asking him to repeat his lecture so you can take notes!" I saw him roll his eyes, (Pulling a me by the way) and glare at Sara.

"Wow King. I never knew you were so hostile. Oh wait, yes I did, you've been like this towards me as long as Lily-flower's been like this towards Prongs here." He gestured to Potter.

"Oh really, Do you hon-"

"Okay!" I interrupted before they turned into Potter and I, I didn't want them tarnishing my reputation as the girl who can scream the loudest. That was a fun day. "Let's go to Defense Against the Dark Arts," I dragged Sara down the corridor.

I heard Remus say, "Yeah, Um, let's go!" Wow Remus.

"MOONY! I thought you were on my side!" I heard Sirius whimper.

"Padfoot, I'm on the side of your education. Now move it!" It sounded like he was getting agitated. Kali and I shared an amused look.

"But Moon-Moons," Wow. "Education isn't fun!" Double wow.

"Hey Sirius!" I called back to him.

"What Lily-Flower?"

"You know what_ is_ fun?" I smiled evilly at Potter.

"Not this?"

"True, this isn't fun… but what really is fun, is slapping Potter here." I grinned as Sirius burst out laughing. Potter rolled his eyes.

"That was _not _fun." He glared at me. "Not fun at all."

"Potter, you've been glaring at me for the past seven years, nothing has changed. You narrowing your eyes on me does effect me.I thought you were smart enough to figure that out by yourself. Hmmm. Guess not." I turned to walk away when he finally spoke up.

"I thought you would be different this year Evans, I really did." He gave me one last disappointed look before stalking off, leaving us all very, very confused.

Damn the world, for surely it must hate me, was my last thought before I blacked out.

* * *

**A/N: I've gotten some complaints about Andy, how, if he's in there, won't it take away from the Lily/James action, this is my response to that: Lily doesn't accept her feelings about James yet. She doesn't think of him as an arrogant toe-rag any more, but she doesn't "like" him yet. And James, he's still trying to get over her, thinking that he'll never get her, so why keep trying, and keep damaging his pride and reputation. Any arguments against that?**

**Any new ideas for Alice's last name? **

**I found something out… Shania Twain would not have been famous at this point in time… please don't hate me! From now on… I'm not going to worry about what songs are from this time period… I'll just use whatever feels right… 'Kay?**

**Well, R & R… and I'll love you all forever… Extra brownie points to everyone who reviews… if you don't… well… ('''\ (;…;) /''') ROAR! I'LL EAT YOU!**

**I'll leave you on that kind note;**

**You're loving author**

**Tark**


	5. Professor WHO?

**Hello again, my avid readers… How are y'all? Me… bored out of my mind… procrastinating from studying for my Math Final… sucky right? Ugh… I hate finals… I have a B in the class, so if I don't get an A on the final, I'll have a tarnished GPA… **

**I've also been working really hard on my yearbook page, for those of you who didn't know, I'm on the yearbook, newspaper, and newsletter committees… hectic right? Well, I've been working on it because we had a deadline last week (February 11, my brother's Birthday haha Happy Birthday…)**

**I got some new music, which was inspiring me as I wrote this chapter… Colbie Caillat's CoCo & Breakthrough (Deluxe Edition), Sara Bareilles' Love Song, and One Republic's Apologize. YAY! I love new music! Anybody have any recommendations?**

**And… am I the only one who thinks **_**The Lord of the Flies**_** sucks? PLEASE tell me I'm not alone…**

**Thanks to: ****AliLuvsAlli-Sirius, and ****Sellesia-Smile**** (I love repetitive reviews **Winks**)****. Y'all are the best… extra brownie points to you guys who reviewed… **** brownie point reduction to everyone who didn't… **** Review this chapter and I'll give you some brownie points… **

**And yes… I am keeping track… **Wiggles eyebrows** And no… I am not a stalker… Sadly I do not know where you live… well, I know where some of my reader's live **Cough, my BFF's, Cough****

**Well… I should shut up and let you read the stuff you really **_**want**_** to read… not me rambling… So… here's chapter 5…**

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**Chapter 5: Professor WHO?**

"Lily, you okay?" A distant voice called.

"Me? Sure, why not." I mumbled.

"Huh? Did she say something?" Someone else asked.

"I'm not sure. I think she did." The first person told them.

"Go 'way" I mumbled to them.

"Lils, why do you want us to go away?" The second voice asked me.

"Why not?"

"Because it's rude to tell someone to go away." A third person defended.

I could now tell that I was lying on a cold stone floor, which was not very comfortable. Why didn't the founders think to put carpets everywhere? It would make the entire castle warmer. Not to mention more comfy.

"Lils, can you see us?" I know that voice, it was the silky one from before, but I can't seem to remember whose it was. I know I had figured it out, but now I don't. Weird

"Sure, why not." I mumbled again.

"I don't think it's a good thing that she's repeating the same thing over and over again. Maybe we should have gotten Madam Pomfrey."

"SIRIUS BLACK! You know what Lily thinks of Madam Pomfrey. She would probably blame me, then try and kill me for leaving her in the hands of… her." I suddenly remembered (again) that the silky voice was none other than James Potter. Great. One more thing I have to worry about. Love you too God.

"Potter, go 'way," I muttered very softly. Hey, what can I say, old habits die hard.

"I think she said something," Potter squealed.

"Wow Prongs, very masculine." Sirius scolded.

"Ah, come on Pads. It ain't my fault you refuse to accept your feminism. I have embraced mine with open arms." He retorted.

"Open arms, my arse." Everyone looked down to see me glaring at the two with my famous death glare.

"Uh oh," Sara muttered, "it's her," the other two girls joined her, "Head Girl do-what-I-say-or-die-glare"

"How long do you think they'll last?" Kali asked the other two, cocking her head at the boys. She mouthed me _30 seconds_. Sneaky girl.

"2 minutes. Tops." Alice gambled.

"I say 1." Sara interjected.

"How much?"

"A galleon."

"Deal."

"Deal."

Little did they realize that the rest of us, Kali, Sirius, Potter and I, were looking at them with amused expressions.

"Well," Sara said after a long awkward silence, "I win, gimme my galleon."

"Actually," I began.

"Lily Evans, if you say that gambling is not allowed I will strangle you."

I chucked, "no, I was going to say that Kali wins."

Protests. God, I love my friends.

* * *

5 minutes later…

* * *

"Sorry Professor, Sirius made us late."

"What? Why is it always my fault?"

"Because… it's always your fault?"

"But Lily's the one who fainted, and Sara and Alice were the ones who were gambling! I was actually the one who helped Kali get you guys here!"

The three of us glared at him.

"Uh, Pads? I think you should sit down if you value your life." Potter muttered to him. It was probably code for; sit down, shut up, and let the Head Girl handle it.

Sirius grumbled while walking to the open seat behind Remus. Potter followed, sitting next to him, behind Peter. Sarah and Alice sat at the opposite side of the room, the only open table was right in front, across from the teacher's desk. I glance at Kali, who shrugged, and started

"As I said before Professor, I am sorry that we were late. As much as I hate to admit, it was partially my fault. You see, it takes forever walking around with these crutches, and Madam Pomfrey wouldn't let me come to my classes without them so, sadly, I have to use them. Well, I had fallen down, and Sirius, somehow, got the idea that I had fainted, I don't know how. But, my friends were helping me up when the boys saw us, and engaged us in conversation, and before we knew it, we were late."

The Professor had not moved from where he had been standing, facing the front, hands clasp behind his back. There was a hint of grey in his dark brown hair. I guess he's not old, like Kinderfeild. I hope that's a good thing.

"Professor?" I asked. After not getting a response, I looked around and saw my Ravenclaw friend; Lynzeen sitting there looking at me, _has he said anything at all?_ I mouthed. She shook her head no. Hmm… I glanced back at the Professor. Cautiously, I set my crutches down, and silently moved up behind him, took my wand out, and cast a silent spell. The entire class gasped, thinking I'd done something terrible. I stuck my tongue out at them. "Professor, why do you have a stunning spell on you?" I asked him as I cast the counter-curse.

"Ten-points to Gryffindor," he said as he turned around and smiled at me. I heard some shuffling behind me, so I looked over my shoulder and saw that the Marauders'' mouths were hanging open, Potter looked more shocked then I have ever seen before, and Kali was well, trying not to laugh, and failing miserably. I threw all of them an annoyed glare and turned back to the Professor. "I was glad that at least one of my classes figured it out, even if it was the smartest girl in my most advanced one." I cocked my head at him. "Oh, I've heard the stories Miss Evans, from Professor Dumbledore, other teachers, students, and my sons."

"Who are your sons, Professor?" I was genuinely curious, in addition to my want to curse whoever had told their parent about me.

"I have one biological son and one adopted one," Avoiding the question huh? Is that how it's gonna be? "How about I just tell the class who I am." He smiled at me one more time and looked at the class, slowly I turned around, and walked to my seat and sat down, my legs were really starting to hurt. Thank God today was Friday… The Professor started walking around. It's getting really annoying not knowing who he is.

"Class, welcome to Defense against the Dark Arts. This will be a very difficult class for some of you," He glared pointedly at the Marauders. Yay! Someone else is on my side. My guess is that Dumbledore told him about those four. "It will be prudent for you to know spells in this class. I won't give you many written or book assignments," The class cheered… loudly. "But," grunts of displeasure, "I will expect you to know each and every spell that I teach you. Perfectly.

"I am a retired Auror, I know what you will and will not need to know out there in the real world. I know what it's like, not knowing what spell to use, whether it'll kill your partner or save them. I know very few of you will become Aurors, but in these dangerous times, everyone needs to know how to defend themselves. Any questions?"

Silence.

* * *

Thirty seconds later…

* * *

Silence.

"Um sir?"

"Yes...?"

"Um, Sara King sir." He nodded for her to continue. "Well, you um, haven't told what your name was."

Kali lost her self control and burst into uncontainable laughter. "I think Miss Kali over here would like to tell the class," The Professor said with a smile.

Kali got control of herself and stood up from her seat next to me, walked over to the Professor, and put an arm around his shoulders. "My friends, my fellow classmates, Slytherins," chuckles and giggles, "I would like to introduce… my neighbor." She added dramatically, and sat back down.

"Uh, Kals? That don't answer my question." Sara told her from across the room.

"Too bad!" Kali stated defiantly.

"Ladies, ladies, calm down." The Professor said impartially. "I would like to teach a spell in the five minutes we have left in class."

With that he started explaining about the counter-curse I used just minutes before. "Hey, Kals," I whispered in Kali's ear. "What's his name?"

"The Professor." I knew that was all I was going to get out of her so I turned toward the board and paid about half attention. The rest of my mind was, surprisingly, thinking about Andy.

The bell rang and Kali jumped up and ran off somewhere, I could see Sara and Alice already walking out the door. I sighed and started picking up my stuff. Still thinking about Andy. Dang! Why couldn't I get him out of my head? I know what Sara would say. "Girl you're finally becomin' a woman. EMBRACE IT!" God I hate that girl.

"Hey," Speak of the devil. I swear I jumped up five feet

"Hey, what's up?"

"Uh, we never found out who he was, did we?"

"Nope, he kept avoiding it. It was a little weird wasn't it?"

"Totally. I thought you were amazing though." Honestly? I blushed, inward sigh, why do I blush so easily? Oh yeah, it's because I'm a stupid red-head with stupid pale skin. Another inward sigh.

"What do you mean? All I did was cast a simple spell."

"Simple? He said we wouldn't have even learned that until this spring if you hadn't used it!"

"Sorry, I had kinda zoned him out, there's this one person I can't get off my mind. I don't know why?

"Is it Potter? Please tell me it's not Potter."

"Thank God it's not him. I honestly don't know what I'd do if it were him. Maybe kill myself." We both laughed at that. Looking down at my stuff, I realized I had picked up all my stuff.

"Walk with me Evans."

I sat back down and bent to pick up my crutches, when Andy saw what I was doing, and picked them up for me. He handed them to me; and he left his hand on mine for longer than necessary. I stared into his eyes for a long time. Until, after clearing his throat, he stood up.

"Sure," I told him with a smile, "I'll limp with you."

"So, who's the lucky guy?" he asked me.

"What?"

"The guy who's been occupying your thoughts." He prompted.

"How do you know it's a guy?" I said mischievously, raising my eyebrows.

"Really? It's a girl be-" He stopped talking suddenly and was staring at something around the corner.

"What? What is it?" I looked around the corner and saw Kali and Potter, arms around each others shoulders; talking and laughing about something. "Well," I said, "that isn't something you see every day."

"That, I totally agree with."

We turned around and he walked me back to the Gryffindor Common Room, as it was the end of the school day.

"I had fun. Thanks so much." I turned around to 'limp' in, but he grabbed my hand and pulled me to him. His lips met mine in an instant of pure bliss.

"Go to Hogsmede with me, Lily." He said when we broke apart.

"Yeah, thanks again."

With that, I hobbled through the portrait hole.

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**Hey, KujoNutty, I added the Andy scene, just for you…**

**And I'm sure I totally messed up that kissing scene… but oh well…**

**Thanks to everyone who reviewed... Remember... BROWNIE POINTS!  
**

**From…**

** Tark-Tark**


	6. I Love to Hate Him

**Hello, my avid readers… I love all the reviews I'm getting… I love the fact that I get feed-back! And thank you to everyone who told me that last chapter sucked… It did… I know… one of my best friends was pressing me to put a new chapter up (she can be very impatient sometimes**** I'm mad at her right now) and so I just threw some (pardon my language) crap together and posted it… Sorry…**

**I'm also getting a lot of hate mail about Andy… not cool… definitely not cool! I've explained about Andy… and he's staying… at least for a little while that is **insert evil smirk****

**Don't worry; I still love you guys… so here's chapter 6… fresh of the press…**

**Chapter 6: I Love to Hate… Him**

I walked in (well, limped in) and sat down in my favorite chair in front of the fire, my head still in a daze. That was one event I didn't see coming. My crush of almost a year, just kissed me. Kissed Me! Oh my god! It was so amazing. There is no other way to describe it other than… amazing.

"Hey Lil?" Someone behind me asked. I jumped. I turned around to glare at someone, then saw that it was Sara.

"Oh, hi Sar," I said, turning back around to stare at the fire.

"You okay?" she asked, sitting down in the chair next to mine. "You've seemed a little distant all of yesterday and today." She looked really worried.

"I'm sorry; I had a lot of trouble with my sister over the summer. We fought a lot. Even more than usual. She has this new boyfriend. He is not only an idiot, but also well, let's see, never mind, I'm not even going to try and be polite. He's a whale!" we both laughed and sat in silence for a while. "and the fact that Andy kinda just kissed me." I smirked at her.

"OH MY GOD!" She started pacing the common room muttering Holy crap, over and over again. "This is awesome!" I smiled at her.

"Oh! I was supposed to come and find you! I can't believe I forgot!" I looked at her, puzzled. "James wants to show you something." I felt something deep down in my stomach lurch, for no apparent reason… maybe…

"Why would Potter want to show me something?"

"I don't know! I'm just the messenger! Now shoo! We'll talk about the details of you're little incident," She winked at me, "Later."

"You never told me where he was!"

"The Entrance hall! SHOO!"

After practically pushing me out of the portrait hole, then handing me my crutches, Sara smirked at me and slammed the painting of the Fat Lady shut.

"Ow!" the Fat Lady muttered. "You young people have no respect anymore." She scolded me.

"We young people have no respect for ourselves, if you know what I mean."

"Actually no," she told me offhandedly, "I have no idea what you mean.

"No one respects each other anymore. We're all rude to each other, or we ignore each other, or we just plain hate each other. Get it?"

"Yes, I understand what you are saying. And I totally agree with you. Just from what I've seen with the Gryffindor's, supposedly the most honorable of the school, you children have either too much, or too little pride, or you're pride is masked by something you've done or something someone else is doing to you." She studied me for a few seconds. "And from what I've seen with you, young lady, you're hiding behind your intelligence. Not wanting an excuse to step out of your comfort zone. People categorize you as bright, and you let them. Not wanting to be the center of attention. Also; you hold grudges. Some are well deserved, others… not so much." She straightened, and I knew our little chat was over. "Just something to think about Miss Head Girl."

(Line)

Confused beyond belief, I walked (limped) down to the Entrance Hall. Why, the hell, would Potter make me, a girl on _crutches_, walk all the way down to the Entrance Hall, the entirely opposite end of the castle from the Gryffindor common room.

He was sitting on the floor, and surprisingly, reading a book. And it wasn't even a book for school. From the looks of it, it was The Lord of the Rings. A classic. And one of my absolute favorite series'. Hmmm, new development. Potter can read. Interesting.

I cleared my throat. "Sara told me you had something to show me." I said sourly.

"Uh, yeah." He replied, while getting up. "And why the bitterness? It totally ruins the mood!"

"You're in a good mood. I'm not. Got it?"

"Why aren't you in a good mood?" He asked while motioning me to follow him through the corridor.

"Well, there's this idiot," I paused for dramatic effect, "and he wanted to show me something. So, being the idiot he is, asked me to trek the long, hard route, on crutches, across the ENTIRE school. Does that answer your question."

"Uh, sure?" He said nervously.

We walked in silence for a few minutes, the only sound we heard were our own footsteps. And my crutches of course. I really hate these things.

"Where are you taking me anyway?"

"The common room." He replied simply. I stopped dead in my tracks

"THE COMMON ROOM? THE BLOODY COMMON ROOM? I WAS JUST. BLOODY. THERE. YOU IDIOT!"

He seemed unfazed by my shouting. "Not that common room." Again, with the simplicity!

"Fine then," I said, resuming following him. "What common room is it?"

"You'll see." Now I was _really _irritated. The idiot thinks he can make me walk around the castle on crutches. Without telling me where he's taking me? He's a bigger arse than I thought! And to think, I was starting to think of him as a friend!

"I hate you," I muttered softly.

Somehow, he heard me. "That's insulting," he chided.

"I know it is… that's why I said it." I mumbled.

He stared at me for a second before he busted out laughing. "Wow Evans, you are so predictable." He looked at me out of the corner of his eye, hopefully seeing all the anger I could muster and turning it into a terrifying glare. He laughed even harder because of it.

"I still hate you." I told him, which made him laugh all the more. God, I really hate do him. Most of the time. It's the rest of the time that scares the heck out of me.

"Evans, you do know that that is very, very, _very_ insulting right." He said it with a smile on his face, so I knew he was joking.

"Well, I'm sooo sorry, Mr. Potter. You'll just have to ignore me forever and ever and ever. For I shall never be able to make it up to you." I sighed for dramatic effect, while inside my head, I was screaming at myself to shut up. Why though. Why wouldn't I want Potter to leave me alone… forever? It would make my life so much easier. And yet, I find myself not wanting him gone. Great. Just great.

"Really?" He asked miserably. "You honest to God want me to ignore you forever?" Uh oh. What should I do? I want him gone, yet I don't want him gone. AHHHH!

"Wow, James Potter can't take a joke. Mark the calendar, call the press."

He did something very un-James-Potter-ish. He stuck is tongue out at me.

"Oh how very mature of you." I snickered.

"Suck it Evans." He joked.

"I don't really feel like it," I was trying to hold back a smile, which, for some reason, was very difficult. And, I don't really know why I was trying not to smile. I also don't know why I was even smiling in the first place. God, I hate my life right now. It's too damn complicated.

"Well, then, if you—are you okay?"

"Well, usually when someone collapses on the floor and cries out in pain, they're not okay." I glowered at him.

I crawled over to the wall, and leaned up against it. My legs had suddenly given way, and I had crashed to the floor.

"I hate my legs! UGH! Whoever did whatever they did to them, should burn in hell! Bloody fucking hell!" I went on for a few more seconds before I noticed Potter's face. It was a mix between horror and shock.

"Wow." Potter stared at me in amazement. "I've heard you cuss a lot, most of it has been aimed at me. But never, in my entire heard you cuss that badly before. Heck, I don't think I've ever heard anyone cuss that bad before!"

"And everyone thinks _I'm_ sheltered." I mumbled under my breath.

"Do you want to stay here and rest a while before we head out," he said, either ignoring my comment, or he hadn't heard it. "Or, would you rather get there now and be able to rest in a bed?"

"Pain now, rest later. Works every time." I muttered, still glaring at him. He looked really worried about me. Probably making me think he cares. Or maybe he really does care. No! That's impossible. James Potter cannot care about me. Didn't I cover this already?

"Then how are we going to do this?"

"How, the hell, should I know?"

"Fine." He walked over to me, and picked me up. He carried me down the hall, bridal style. Again.

"Uh, Potter?"

"What?" He sounded irritated. Probably because he had to carry me again. Haha to him.

"You do know that you forgot _all _my stuff back there right?"

"Crap."

Cursing, he set me down, and jogged back through the hallways. Ow, this hurts. I looked down at my ankles. Both of which were swollen, red, and from the looks of it, very raw. How on earth could that have happened? I've been extra careful about my ankles and feet today! Wearing something barely above slippers, with McGonagall's permission of course. Then I remembered, while Potter and I were arguing back there, I had heard faint footsteps, and some muttering. Which would've been normal. If it hadn't been during supper.

"Here's your stupid stuff," he said grouchily.

"Shh!"

"What? Oh no you don't!" He was being _really _loud.

"Potter, shut up!"

"NO!"

"I think we're followed. And I think whoever it is, cast a spell on my ankles!" I whispered urgently. I saw his eyes go wide in understanding. Sorry, he mouthed. I rolled my eyes, and then motioned for us to continue.

After picking me up again, much to my displeasure (I think), he walked us to a painting of a young man in Victorian clothing standing in front of a magnificent castle. He was kinda cute too. I smiled and waved at him. He returned the smile and nodded a Potter.

"Password, m'lady?" I looked at him, confused, then I looked at Potter, who looked like he wanted to punch the man.

"The Shining Light of the European Islands; the Castle of Fairfax, SLEI for short." He said, glowering at the Victorian.

"Very good, sir, very good." And with that, Potter carried me through the portrait hole.

"What kind of password is that?" I asked before I looked around the room we were standing in. Then completely lost my train of thought.

The room was absolutely marvelous. Wait, no. That doesn't even begin to describe this room. With a ceiling was enchanted the same way as the Great Hall, we could see the sky, which was purple from the sunset, above us, which only made the height of it more glamorous. I could tell we were in one of the many towers in the castle because of the circular shape of the room. The floor was covered with a very plush type of carpeting. A Fireplace dominated one side of the room, floor to ceiling. The other side held a grand staircase leading up to a central balcony with two doors. (**A/N: A grand staircase is a staircase with two identical staircases on either side that are curved and lead up to meet at one point.)** A seating area with room for at least a dozen people filled the space between the fireplace and the staircase. The walls of the entire space were covered in bookshelves, except for one portion of the wall opposite the portrait hole, which held, from the looks of it, an outdoor balcony. Two desks were near the staircases, between them really.

Wow, I could live here. I thought, as Potter dropped my stuff off on one of the couches, and started up the left staircase. "Why did you bring me here?" I asked him as he walked over to the right hand door. He ignored me. I looked at the door, it had a nameplate on it but I couldn't quite read it from the position I was at in Potter's arms.

He walked in a put me down on a magnificent bed. With the draperies and everything.

"See you tomorrow Evans, I can bring Alice or Sara here if you want."

"Kali, please." He turned to walk away, "Oh, and Potter," He raised his eyebrows at me. "Thanks." He walked out of the room without another word.

I looked around the bedroom. At least I think it's a bedroom. Why else would it have a bed in it? There was a vanity table near a huge bay window. Bookshelves everywhere. And 2 or 3 dressers spread out throughout the room. A door was to my right near the nightstand. I couldn't see in it, but I assumed it was a bathroom or something.

I also noticed that my trunk was sitting at the foot of the bed. Smiling, I crawled over to it and got my pajamas out. After putting them on, I looked around for my school bag, the suddenly remembered that Potter had left all that stuff downstairs. Cursing him, I got my books out of my trunk and set them on the floor near my nightstand. I'll take care of them later. I grabbed Little Women and started reading.

* * *

It was getting really late when Kali got there. I was asleep, having just finished Little Women. Again. I was jolted awake by her screaming. "LILS! I'M MOVING IN WITH YOU!" I laughed with her.

"You'll have to stay here tonight anyway. For 2 reasons." I told her.

"Why do I _have_ to stay here tonight?" Lots of emphasis on the have.

"1. It's after hours." She groaned and gave me a please not this lecture again look. "Yeah, I know you don't care about a detention, but I would rather not have you in one." And 2. You get to help me tonight!"

"And what, may I ask, would that entitle?"

"Helping me unpack" more groans. "Unless you would like to have me crawl around in your clothes." I had borrowed some of her clothes this morning since we couldn't find my trunk.

"Why on earth would you be crawling around?" I held up my feet. "Oh, I see."

"Can you get my stuff from the couch downstairs?" She nodded, walking out the door. "Oh, Kals!" She popped her head back in. "What does the nameplate on the door say?"

"Head Girl." she walked out again.

Crap. Crap. CRAP! I have to bloody live with James Potter. LIVE WITH HIM! I am sooooo gonna die.

**

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A/N: So… I hope you like this one better than the last one. I spent an entire 3-day weekend working on it… so I think it's better, but, how will I know if you like it or not if you don't review? So please! R &R! Lift my spirits after they were crushed when I was absolutely terrible at MathCounts last Thursday… PLEASE! **

**I read FF too… I know how annoying writing reviews can be, but I'm also a writer, and I know how much reviews can improve your day. So, if you have an account with FF, and write a review for my story, I will try and read a part of one of your stories (But only if you have a Lily/James FF****) and review it. I hope Bribery works… 'Cause brownie points aren't doin' so well… but thanks to everyone who's reviewed almost every chapter… I think there are 2 of you. AlliLuvsAlliSiruis and Kujo (Sometimes KujoNutty) you guys are awesome…**


	7. Betrayal

**A/N: YAY! Chapter 7! Who-Hoo! I get a break… After Spring Break… Oh, the things I do for you guys… *sighs* this one is especially long… hope you like it!**

**Disclaimer: I've forgotten this the past few times… so… I don't own Harry Potter or anything to do with it… Anything you recognize isn't mine… anything you don't… Is me! **

**Chapter 7: Betrayal**

_I sobbed. I felt myself slide down the cold wall outside the Head's common room. I held my head in my hands and I cried. Why? Why did everyone hate me? Why do they care? Why does it matter? They shouldn't even care that I exist! Why do they want to make my life a living hell?_

"_Lily?"_

_I looked around for the source of the voice. Finding no one, I think I'm going crazy. I stood up and wiped my eyes. I can't let them see that this upsets me. It would be the end of me. Calmly, I walked through the Portrait hole, ignoring the Victorian man in the painting who was hitting on me._

(Line)

12 hours earlier

(Line)

Why? Why does God hate me? Why did _Dumbledore _hate me? Why would he make me live with Potter? I mean, it's a disaster waiting to happen. A guy who is unconditionally in love with a girl who hates him. And all that separates him from her is a wall? Yep. I'm gonna die.

"Here you go." Kali said, dropping all my stuff on my bed. "So, what do you want to do first?" She asked while looking around my room.

"Kals? Did that plate honestly say Head Girl, or were you just messing with me?"

"It said it, why else would I tell you it did?" That's what I like about Kali, she's honest, and doesn't joke around when she knows things are serious. Unlike Sara, who can't tell when a situation's serious or not, unless someone's crying or screaming. Or even Alice, who, believe it or not, is never serious.

"It's just, if this is my room, whose room do you think the other's is? Hm?" I saw realization dawn on her face.

"Oh. God, I really don't know what to think. I want you to live here, in this gorgeous common room. But I also want you to survive this year." She looked at me with sad eyes. "Sorry Lils. I think you're going to have to put up with him. How else will I get any peace and quiet in this castle? Without being in the library that is."

I snorted. "You've never had a problem with the library before Kals. Especially when a certain sandy-haired boy is in there." I teased.

"Oh shut it. You know you'd do anything to get Andy to kiss you." She glared at me. I smirked, giving her a knowing look. "NO WAY! I want details! Is he a good kisser? Where did it happen? When did it happen? How did it happen? Ooooo this is so exciting!"

"Kali?" _Indifferent _

"Yeah?" _Excited_

"Shut up." _Indifferent again_

"Okay." _Disappointed_

That's the thing I don't like about Kali, she gets excited over the little things. Once, she got excited because I told her that my cat had fleas.

"Relax Kals; I'm not going to kill you." I rolled my eyes, "that's reserved for Potter." She gave me a small smile.

"Wow Lils. But really, what happened with Andy?"

And with that, I delved into the story.

(Line)

Ever the early riser, Kali woke me up in the morning when she started the shower.

"Kali? The sun's not even up yet! Why are you?" I yelled through the wall.

"Shut up you lazy ungrateful girl!" Was the response. Yep. Can you believe that she's the nicest of the four of us girls?

When she was done with her shower, we started unpacking my stuff, since we had been talking for so long the night before, we just crashed on my bed.

We had just started organizing my books by my desk when I heard the portrait hole open and someone shouted. "OY! PRONGS! GET YOUR SORRY ASS DOWN HERE SO WE CAN PLAY QUITTITCH!" Black ran up the stairs and into Potter's room.

Kali held up a hand for me to stay silent. She cast disillusionment charm on herself and opened my door a crack.

She disappeared from my sight and I heard a bloodcurdling scream within seconds. Then silence. Then 2 people laughing their heads off. Then silence again. Then: "Black, in the future, I suggest that you don't interrupt Lily's beauty sleep. She gets very angry when she's tired." Kali said in a cautionary tone.

A few seconds later Kali appeared in my room. "That. Was. Awesome!" She screeched. "I can't wait to tell Sara that I made Black scream like a girl."

"This is perfect. Sar's been looking for blackmail to shove in his face to make him stop pranking her. She'll love it!" I giggled. We heard the boys leave. Very loudly shouting 'bye-bye beautiful girlies' along the way. "You should go tell her."

"But, what about you? You can't get out of bed!"

"I think I can move my legs now. But on your way to pick Sara and Alice, stop in and ask Madam Pomfrey for the paste she said she'd make for me. She told me it would take a little over 18 hours and for me to pick it up this morning. Just don't tell her about _this_ incident." I said, gesturing to my feet.

"Got it. See you in about half an hour."

"Remember! The passwords' SLEI!" I shouted after her.

"GOT IT!" She screamed back.

Wow. She can be really loud sometimes.

I stood up on wobbly legs and clutched my crutches. I hobbled into the bathroom and let out a sigh of relief when I saw that there was a huge tub. With a seat. I turned the water on and let it fill up. Returning to my dresser, I grabbed my bathroom stuff, a pair of jeans, a camisole, and a blouse. I also grabbed The Lord of the Rings off the shelf where Kali put my books.

When I returned to the bathroom, I put bubbles in the filled tub, stripped, and hopped into the bubbly water with my book. Sighing, I felt all the emotions of the previous two days fade away into a distant memory.

I read almost a third of my book before I heard voices.

"Oh, Come on Moony! It'll be fun!"

"I do not want to get a detention on the _bloody third day of school!"_

"We've had detentions on the first day of school before!"

"That's different, that wasn't our fault. I know you hate the girls," someone snorted, "but I refuse to prank them!"

"I agree with Moony on this one Pads. Sorry."

"See, even James agrees with me. It's settled. We are not going to burn all of the girls' clothing. That's final, Sirius."

"You guys are no fun."

"Yes Pads, we're no fun. We never break the rules. We never do anything we regret. We never have any fun at all." I heard Potter say. "I'm going to go check on Lily. I wonder if she's feeling better."

Crap. Quickly, I grab the towel from the peg right above my head, and wrap it around myself. I look around for my wand but remember that it's by my bed. Cursing myself, I stay absolutely silent. Maybe if he doesn't hear anything he'll go away.

"Lily?" I heard him knock on my door. "Lily," he called again, opening the door. "If you're in here, just say so, and I'll go away. I just want to make sure you're okay." He opened my bathroom door. Which I was hiding behind.

"I'm going to assume that you are not in here. But if you are, I'm sorry for intruding on whatever you were doing. And to ask you to meet me at the Three Broomsticks at noon for a Head's meeting about the Talent show." I heard him leave my suite. Sighing with relief, I sat down on the side of the tub. I had totally forgotten about the talent show. And the fact that today was a Hogsmede visit. And that last night I promised Andy I would go with him.

Andy. SHIT! I need to get ready. I am not wearing those stupid jeans and blouse on my first date with the guy of my dreams.

Keeping my towel firmly wrapped around my body, just in case Potter decides to come back into my room, I opened the wardrobe with all my nice clothes. Wishing Sara would hurry up and get here so that she can help me with my clothing choices.

Humming to myself, I thumbed through everything, nothing seemed to be appropriate though. I had a lot of winter stuff. Since pretty much all school year, snow covered the ground. All but 4 out of 9 ½ It was below 50 degrees outside.

Hmm. I thought. I could wear my jeans with that sweater. No, it's too hot for a sweater. Jeans and my blue cocktail dress maybe? I could wrap my black belt around and claim it's a tunic. Yeah. That's what I'll do. And I'll where my white knee-length jacket that's really thin. Sara is going to be amazed with my sudden fashion savvy-ness.

The portrait hole opening marked my friends' entrance. I quickly got dressed while Kali laughed at their amazement. "Lily, I cannot believe- WHAT ARE YOU WEARING?" Sara screamed at me.

"Clothes?" I asked nervously.

"It's amazing! I never knew you were so good with clothes! Why did you never do this yourself! It would've saved me so much more time!"

"Sara, it's so much easier letting you do it."

"Lils, why are you so dressed up? What's the special occasion?" Alice asked. Clueless to the events of the previous night.

"Our little Head Girl has gotten herself a date with the boy of her dreams." Kali snickered.

"Oh, shut it Kals." I shot back at her. She only laughed at me. "Do I look okay, I'm not overdoing it?"

"Sweetheart, if any guy doesn't turn and gawk at you, you haven't done your job right. You've done it right. Good girl." Sara smiled at me.

"Which means?" I prompted.

"It means your clothes look great. But I get to do your hair." She laughed evilly. Alice, Kali and I all groaned. "What, you want me to do you two too?"

"Sara, can I just put on my black overcoat and go to breakfast? Then you can do my hair afterward?"

She looked utterly thwarted "Fine."

Smiling, I asked kali to get my coat for me. "Why can't you?" she asked.

"Because, although I have the ability to walk, doesn't mean I will all day. Speaking of which, do you have my paste?"

She grabbed a bottle out of her bag and threw it at me. "'Twice a day, every day,'" She mocked Madam Pomfrey, causing the three of us to laugh. "'It'll work instantly.'"

Opening the bottle, I got a sudden whiff of rotten eggs. Gagging, I spread it all over my feet, ankles, and lower legs. I gasped as pain seared through my lower body, then disappeared completely.

I stared at my legs in amazement, before standing up and testing them. I jumped up and down and smiled evilly at my friends. Looking back at my ankles, I noticed that there was only a faint scar.

"Um, why don't you wear those sandals with the straps? And change into capris."

"I agree with the sandals, but capris? Really?" 

"Reason 1, its way too hot outside for jeans. Reason 2, that outfit looks cuter in capris."

"But I look cuter in jeans," I muttered under my breath, while taking my jeans off. Alice, the only one who heard me, rolled her eyes.

"Let's get down to breakfast." She said.

"Totally, I'm so hungry. I never knew putting away Lil's stuff makes you this hungry!" Kali rubbed her stomach. 

"Kal, it was probably because you scared the crap out of Black." I said off-handedly.

"WHAT!"

"I take it you haven't told her yet." I whispered to Kali, who shook her head.

"Haven't gotten the chance." She whispered back.

"Sorry," I mouthed.

"Okay, I need to know. Every little detail. Everything!" Sara glared at Kali.

Kali and I had been cowering behind a couch at the bottom of the stairs. Glancing at Kali, I decided what my best course of action would be. I shoved Kali out into the open and shouted, "She'll tell you everything while I go eat!"

"LILS! WHY ARE YOU LEAVING ME?"

"Because eating is so much easier when I don't have to worry about you explaining about making Black squeal!"

"Why?" Alice asked, utterly confused.

"Because, even though I heard it, and was there when it happened, it'll still make me laugh! Obnoxiously!"

"Which is so un-Lily-like" Sara agreed.

"At least in the eyes of the student body. We know better though." Kali put in.

"They've never seen her during the summer." Alice smirked.

"I hate my friends."

"Love you too Lils!" they all yelled as I walked out the door.

Laughing at my friends' stupidity, I waved at the Victorian man.

"You look happy," he told me.

"My friends are stupid, is all."

"Well, have fun wherever you're going." He winked at me. Okay, stalker-ish.

"Bye," I muttered cautiously.

(Line)

I pulled my overcoat around me tight as I practically ran down the stairs. While attempting to get my bearings at where in the castle I was, I hummed softly to myself. Realizing that I was in the East Tower, I started for the nearest stairway.

"But _Prongs_!" I heard a familiar voice whine. "I really want to do it!"

"Shut up Pads, or I won't let you in my dorm!"

"I wouldn't recommend going into the dorm, to anyone. Let alone Black here." I said walking around the corner, and seeing Black and Potter.

"And why is that, dear Lily-flower?"

"Enough with that pathetic nickname, Black!" I sighed, trying to control my temper. Black irritates me even more this year, than in years past. "It's been overrun by girls sharing the juiciest gossip of the Hogwarts Gossip Chain."

"Anything about me?" He asked, winking at me. Enough with the winking! First the Victorian man, and now Black? It's enough to drive a girl mad!

"Actually, yes."

"really?" He looked genuinely surprised. "King is really talking about me? This is hilarious! Prongs, look out the window! Are there pigs in the air?"

"Yeah, Black. Um, they're talking about how Kali made you scream like a girl." I saw his face fall.

"You seem disappointed, Black." I teased.

"Shut it Evans." He growled.

I turned to Potter, "If I didn't know better, I would say Sirius Black has, dare I say it, _feelings _for, god forbid, _Sara King_?"

"I said shut it!" Black repeated.

Potter was suppressing a laugh, which was causing him to tear up. "Now see what you've done Black, you've made Potter cry. Why don't you just admit it, and then I'll leave you alone." I smiled sweetly at him.

"LILS, YOU STILL CLOSE?" my smile grew even bigger.

"You better run, Black, otherwise Sara might just kill you." I smirked.

"You'll pay for this, Evans. If it's the last thing I do, you'll pay for this."

"Oooo, I'm so scared." Black glared at me one last time before stalking off. I sighed in relief and Potter busted out laughing.

"Wow, Evans. He only gets that upset when Moony tells him that he's a stupid idiotic player who will die an old pervert. "

"Remus actually says that?"

"I kind of altered it a little."

"A little?"

"Okay, I altered it a lot. Happy?" I laughed.

"Lils, there you are. Hey Potter." Sara jogged up behind me.

"You missed all the action!" he told her.

"Yeah, Black was with Potter here," Sara's whole demeanor changed, but I decided to ignore it, "and I kinda teased him." Potter snorted. "Fine! I practically made him slaughter me!"

"I'm so proud of you." She wiped away a fake tear. "Well, Alice still doesn't understand what we were talking about, so Kali is staying behind to continue to explain it to her. Alice is hopeless when it comes to gossip." She noted sadly, shaking her head.

"Well, I was heading to breakfast, you guys want to come with me?" I asked.

"Sure," Sara muttered, "I'll come with you, I guess, I've got nothing better to do. I mean, even though you are boring, you are better than no one." I could tell by her smile, that she was joking.

"Hardy-har-har."I stuck my tongue out at her.

We both looked at Potter, who was staring wide-eyed at me. "Potter, you coming or not?" Sara asked him.

"What? Oh, I was just shocked at the fact that Lily Evans, the girl who has hated me for the past 7 years, just asked me if I wanted to walk to breakfast with her. I wouldn't be surprised if hell had frozen over."

"I never hated you." I said softly, half hoping he wouldn't hear, half hoping he would. God, I need to get my emotions under control. Or else this is going to be a hard year.

"What?" he spun around, with a stunned look on his face.

Sara, who hadn't heard me, jumped at his sudden outburst. "What is it?"

"Nothing," he said, still looking at me. Sara accepted this, and started walking again.

We walked the rest of the way to the Great Hall in silence.

(Line)

"Pass me the toast, Potter."

"Here you go, Evans."

"Thanks."

The three of us were sitting in the middle of the Gryffindor table in the Great Hall. We'd been talking about the upcoming Hogsmede trip when Potter started talking about the Quidditch tryouts next weekend.

"You should tryout this year Sar." I told her.

"I'll never make it." She complained.

"I'm the captain. If you do well, you'd make it." Potter told her.

"See, he said he'll put you on!" I joked. They both snorted.

"Lils, you better go finish getting ready." Sara said, shaking her head with a huge smile on her face.

"Yeah, I should. See you at noon, Potter." I waved.

"How do you know about that?" He asked suspiciously, eyeing me.

"Hey, you can't blame a girl for hiding!"

He smiled and shooed me away. I couldn't help but smile too. There really is something wrong with me.

(Line)

"Lily, are you okay? You seem distracted." Andy and I were walking down the main drive of Hogsmede.

"Yeah, sorry. I'm just thinking." I gave him an apologetic smile.

"What about?" he prompted. 

"Oh, nothing." I had been thinking about something I really shouldn't.

Potter.

I sighed. He has been on my much more than I'd care to admit. "It doesn't sound like nothing." He raised his eyebrows at me, "come on, you can tell me."

"I have to meet James at the Three Broomsticks at noon." I divulged. Andy stopped dead in his tracks.

"Did you just say James?" Anger laced his voice.

I hesitated, "Yeah, why?"

"You never call Potter, James." He grabbed my arm and spun me around. "May I put emphasis on the _never_."

"Andy," I pleaded, "he's helped me a lot these past two days. More than you could ever know."

"I think I know exactly what's going on. You're falling for him. My God, You're falling for him." He was crushing my wrist. I cried out in pain, which caused him to hold on even tighter. "I never thought I'd see the day when you fell for him. You stupid bitch."

"You can't control me." I wrenched my arm out of his grasp. "No one can. Anyone who tries has to deal with my girls." I growled. "Do you really want to deal with my girls?"

"I think I can handle a geek, a nutcase, and a whore."

"You just made the biggest mistake of your life." I turned so that my hair smacked him in the face.

"No, you just did!" was his response.

I was mad. I wasn't thinking. I was being rash. Those were the excuses that went through my mind as I made a judgment call. This will probably change the course of my life, but I don't care.

I whistled as loud as I could. Alice, who had been in a clothing shop across the street, popped her head out, saw me pissed, and smiled.

"LILS!" she called, "WHO CAN I BEAT UP?"

"Ditto," I heard Kali say as she and Sara appeared behind Andy.

"Who, the hell, do you think?" I asked like it was the most obvious thing in the world.

"Where is Potter? I mean the ass honestly has the guts to—"

"Sar, it's not James." She looked surprised at my use of his first name, "It's the idiot directly in front of you."

"Oh, you mean this guy?" She asked while punching Andy in the face.

"Uh, Come ON, SAR! Is that really the best you can do? He only has a bloody broken nose! You're supposed to break his bloody FACE!" Sara rolled her eyes at Kali's remarks.

"Guys, I think we should let him go," I said.

"Why?" Alice whined, "I haven't even gotten a shot at him yet!"

"We don't want to lose our reputations do we?" Sara mumbled something about not caring about stupid reputation.

I turned back to Andy, who was clutching his nose. "If I even hear a single word about this incident, I will tell my girls what you called them. And I'll tell Professor Dumbledore that you attacked his Head Girl. Is that understood?"

He nodded quickly, before running away.

"Now, let's have some fun!" Sara said eagerly.

"Nah, I think I'm going to turn in." I said.

"Ah, Lils, you're not gonna listen to whatever that bastard said to you are you?"

"No," I sighed. "It's what someone else said." I turned away back towards the castle before they could see the tears forming in my eyes.

(Line)

**Okay people! I'm starting a one-shot that may take me a while, so… sorry if in advance if I don't update as regularly as I have been (every 2 or 3 weeks?)… **** It just means I'm working on something else…****! **

**And, I hope that this chapter satisfied all you Andy-Haters… You know who you are *Glare***

**Bye-Bye… R & R! ('''\ (;…;) /''') **

**You're loving author… (Unless you don't review then I won't be so loving****)**

**Tark**

**P.S. I need some ideas for some songs for Andy, who I'm going to put in the Talent show. So… any song ideas? I already have our other main characters covered… *insert evil laugh***


	8. A New Perspective

**A/N: Yay! I'm so happy! I updated within 3 DAYS of my last chapter… not 3 weeks! Aren't I awesome? *smiles cheekily***

**Thanks to: ****Sellesia-Smile, Main Source of Annoyance, ****Loslote****, AliLuvsAlli-Sirius, & Kujo for reviewing. It completely made my day! **

**So… here's Chapter 8… This chapter has a little bit of song in it… sorry… **

**Chapter 8: A New Perspective

* * *

**

I sobbed. I felt myself slide down the cold wall outside the Head's common room. I held my head in my hands and I cried. Why? Why did everyone hate me? Why do they care? Why does it matter? They shouldn't even care that I exist! Why do they want to make my life a living hell?

"Lily?"

I looked around for the source of the voice. Finding no one, I think I'm going crazy. I stood up and wiped my eyes. I can't let them see that this upsets me. It would be the end of me. Calmly, I walked through the Portrait hole, ignoring the Victorian man in the painting who was hitting on me.

I walked out to the balcony. I felt the rush of a summer's breeze brush over my face and hair. I closed my eyes and listened to the birds calling in the distance. Leaves where rustling somewhere in the Forbidden Forest. Laughter echoed up from Hogsmede. Waves crashed far below against the cliff that the castle was resting upon.

I sighed as I felt the tears start again. I leaned against the railing and looked out over the lake. It was a truly beautiful view. I took in the sight of it and tried to stop the torrent of tears that had taken over. Stupid Ravenclaws should know better than mess with the Head Girl.

Shaking my head, I hummed the melody of the song, trying to remember the lyrics. Kali, who is obsessed with music, has given me a lot of music over the course of our friendship. And when I say a lot, I mean _a lot_!

_Behind the Scenes_, that's it! I thought it was something like that. I started singing it, surprisingly, I wasn't off-key. After not singing for about a week, I should be a little rusty, but I guess not.

_You may think  
I'm just fine  
how could anything  
ever be out of line?_

_I take my time  
to set the stage  
to make sure everything  
is all in place_

_Even though I've got the lines rehearsed  
a picture only paints a thousand words_

_Things aren't always what they seem  
You're only seeing part of me  
There's more than you could ever know  
Behind the scenes  
I'm incomplete and I'm undone  
But I suppose like everyone  
There's so much more that's going on  
Behind the scenes_

_Sometimes I can't see  
Anything  
Through the dark  
Surrounding me  
And at times I'm unsure  
About the ground  
Beneath my feet  
If it's safe and sound_

_When it's hard to find hope in the unseen  
I have peace in knowing it will find me_

_Things aren't always what they seem  
You're only seeing part of me  
There's more than you could ever know  
Behind the scenes  
I'm incomplete and I'm undone  
But I suppose like everyone  
There's so much more that's going on  
Behind the scenes_

_You may think I'm just fine  
how could anything ever be out of line?_

_Things aren't always what they seem  
You're only seeing part of me  
There's more than you could ever know  
Behind the scenes  
I'm incomplete and I'm undone  
But I suppose like everyone  
There's so much more that's going on  
Behind the scenes_

By the end of the song, I was singing with all my might. I had stopped crying which I was glad about. I was going to sit down on one of the benches when I heard a knock on the door.

Funny, I thought. I never knew you could knock on a portrait hole. I guess I'm not the witch everyone thinks I am. And maybe I was right all along.

I opened the door to reveal the Defense against the Dark Arts teacher; who, to my displeasure, I still haven't figured out the name of. "Ah, Lily. I assumed you would be in Hogsmede this weekend." He smiled at me. He wasn't too old, probably in his late 40's early 50's. He was nice too. That helps my opinion of him.

"I just got back." I returned his smile.

"Ah, I see. I was just looking for James." He told me conversationally.

"Potter? Oh, he should be in Hogsmede. I was supposed to meet him at the Three Broomsticks, but was feeling a little sick, so I came back." I glanced up at his room, "Why? Is he in some kind of trouble?"

"No, I just needed to talk to him, is all." He smiled before turning away.

"I never caught your name yesterday in class." I told him, curious.

"Ask one of the boys." He replied simply.

"One of the Marauders? Why only them?"

"Because they and your friend, Kali, are the only ones in the student body who know who I am."

"Way to be specific." I muttered after he had walked back through the portrait hole.

I sighed again. I guess all I can do is get down to that essay for McGonagall. Walking up to my room, I grabbed my school bag. I grabbed a book on the way out too, just in case I finished my essay before expected.

Sitting down on the balcony, I completed my entire essay in an hour and a half. Looking at the grandfather clock on the wall with the portrait hole, I noticed that it was quarter to noon.

I suppose I could still meet James. Wait—James? When did _that_ happen? That's the whole reason Andy got mad at me. Stupid Potter, getting me into trouble with the only guy I'd really ever liked. What an ass.

I changed into more comfortable clothes and walked out the door of the common room.

It was slightly warmer than it had been two hours previously when I had been down on the lawn last.

I walked briskly towards the town of Hogsmede. Again. The only difference is that last time, I was walking with Andy. Now, I'm walking alone. Quite a difference, I'd say.

* * *

When I reached the Three Broomsticks, I hesitated at the entrance, wondering if I was late. Ignoring the feeling of guilt that crept into my stomach, I pushed open the wooden door.

I saw James sitting at a table, alone. He had a bunch of papers spread out in front of him that it looked like he was reading. I sat down in front of him. "Sorry if I'm late." I apologized.

"You're early actually." He didn't look up from the papers.

"Oh."

"I thought you went back up to the castle. Sara said you did at least." He looked at me with a surprised expression on his face.

"Yeah, I did. But I figured I shouldn't miss our first real Head's meeting." I shrugged, ignoring the butterflies swirling around in my stomach.

"I don't understand you, Evans." My stomach knotted up at his use of my last name. I know if shouldn't bother me, as he's been using it for the past seven years and I haven't done anything to indicate for him to do otherwise, but it still did. "I mean, you're so different this year."

"Is that such a bad thing?" I asked him, attempting to sound indifferent.

"No, it's just… surprising." He looked at me with those hazel eyes. I don't know what changed over the summer, but he's changed too. Maybe I should tell him that. But I don't want to be pushy. Maybe we should just start on the talent show. But I think I _should_ tell him.

James hopefully didn't know that I was having an inner argument with myself over what to say to him. "You've changed too." I said quietly, looking down at my hands which were folded in my lap.

"Really?" he sounded surprised, which caused me to look back up.

"Yeah. You're not _as_ immature as you were last year." I emphasized the as to indicate that he's still immature.

"And that's a good thing." He mocked hurt.

I kicked him playfully, "Yes, Potter, that's a good thing." I stared at him for a few seconds before I cleared my throat and said. "We should probably get down to business."

"Yeah, sure." I said, looking distracted. "I was thinking that we should introduce it to the school sometime within the next week."

"Okay, I agree with that. Go on."

"We would need to set an age range. I was going for 4th years through 7th years. Sound good?"

"Yeah."

"Then we need to— Evans, are you okay?" He asked me suddenly.

"Yeah, I'm fine, it's just— I'm a little distracted. Sorry, go on."

"Is it something you want to talk about?"

"No, I'm fine. Let's continue."

Giving me a worried glance, he went on. "Then we need to discuss what types of songs will be allowed."

"All songs." I said. I will not let him illegalize any of my songs. Not one.

"Yeah, but I was wondering if we should let only wizard, or only muggle, or both. What do you think?"

"Both. Some people, like me, would only know muggle songs, and other people would only know wizard songs, so…" I let my voice trail off, letting him complete my thought on his own.

"Okay, I see where you're coming from." He looked down at his notes. He crinkled his eyebrows like there was something wrong. It was kind of cute. NO! I DO NOT FIND JAMES POTTER CUTE! I hope not, at least. "I'm missing something."

"What about how many people can participate?"

"Thank_ you_, Lily!" He smiled at me, and the butterflies returned. "How about one person, or one group, per dormitory. That would be 8 per year, or," he thought for a second, "32 participants."

"That's a lot of people." I told him.

"We could limit them to one song." He suggested.

"How about three." I haggled.

"Let's compromise at two." He suggested.

"Okay, two is better than one, I guess." I sighed dramatically.

"Or, we could go with three." He looked troubled that he'd upset me. "I mean, really. How many Slytherins would you expect to participate?" I laughed at the image of Rudolf and Snape doing an Irish folk dance.

"What's so funny?" he asked.

"When you said that, I had an image of Rudolf and Snape doing a shin-dig." I kept laughing, and he joined me.

"Okay," he said after we had both gotten control of ourselves, "I think this concludes our Head Duties of the day." He held up his hands in a relieved fashion. "Want to get something to eat? I'll buy."

"Uh," I really didn't know what to say to this. "Sure?"

"You don't have to, if you don't want to," he said, hurriedly.

"Potter, I haven't eaten in over 4 hours. I'm starved."

"Really? I didn't know girls got hungry that fast." He said, waving a waitress over.

"You have a lot to learn about the female species." I smiled up at him.

"Maybe you could teach me." He teased, looking down at me.

"Yeah, sure! I'll teach you the inner workings of the final frontier. Which, everyone who knows about it, is sworn to secrecy at birth, so. Sorry." I joked.

"What can I get ya?" a woman about 25 asked us. She was chewing her bubble gum very loudly, it was very distracting.

"We'll both take a," He winked at me, "we'll both take a double-fudge sundae with extra icing."

My eyes widened at the thought of all that chocolate. It would be heavenly. "Thank you." I said after the waitress had left. "Did you know that I love chocolate, or was it a guess, or was it just chance?"

"Honestly Lily, I know pretty much everything there is to know about you. You think I wouldn't know that you adore chocolate?" He sounded hurt.

"No, I was just surprised that you would remember."

"I remember everything about you."

I sat there, thinking over what he just said. He really did care about me, I guess.

"Here you guys are. It'll be 5 sickles." The waitress said as she brought our shakes. James was one step ahead of her with 6 sickles already on the table.

"Keep the change" he said, grabbing the shakes and standing up.

"Thank you." I smiled at her.

"You guys are very welcome. Have fun."

Handing me my shake, James and I walked through the double doors of the popular pub.

"Yum," I said smacking my lips after my first sip. "Chocolatey."

"You know, Evans, you haven't yelled at me once today." He chuckled.

"Would you like me to change that?" I asked mischievously.

"No, if I get yelled at, I want there to be a good reason for it. I was just surprised. Did you yell at someone else or something?"

"Yeah, I yelled at Andy West, you know, that stupid Ravenclaw in our year?"

"Oh, the guy who is standing on the other side of the street glaring at us like we're personally insulting him?"

I looked out of the corner of my eye and saw that, sure enough, Andy, the idiot, West, was glaring at me. "yep. That's him."

"What did he do to ensue the wrath of the almighty Lily Evans?" James asked with a grin.

"He threatened me." I said like it was nothing.

"He WHAT?"

"He threatened me." I shrugged. "It's no biggie. Sara took care of it."

"Is that why he has a broken nose?"

"Yep!"

"I'll have to thank her next time I see her. Saved me some time." He took on a more serious demeanor. "But really, why did he threaten you?"

"It was a really small thing. We were walking, and were talking and you came up, and I said 'I have to meet James at the Three Broomsticks at noon' and he got mad that I called you James. He grabbed my wrist and started twisting it. Then he threatened me, and I called my girls. Then we knocked him around a few times, and he ran away."

James waited until I was done talking. Then, he took a sip of his shake. "You really called me James?"

"Yeah. I was about as surprised as he was, but it's all over now."

"So, I suppose you're going to go back to calling me Potter." He said, a little disappointed.

"Nah, I kind of like the sound of your name. James." I told him with a smile. "Or what about Jamsie? That's what Sirius calls you isn't it?"

"You, under no circumstances will ever call me Jamsie." He said with mock seriousness.

"Sure thing Jamsie!" I laughed. James kept trying to act mad, but I could tell that he thought it was funny to, due to the fact that the ends of his mouth were turning upward.

"Hey James? The Defense Against the Dark Arts professor came to the Heads dorm looking for you while I was there. He said he wanted to talk to you."

"Ah, okay. I should probably go find him." He said, like he didn't really want to.

"What's his name?" I suddenly remembered something he told me yesterday. He had tow sons here. One biological, and one adopted. But then he said today that the only people who knew who he was were the Marauders and Kali. But that would mean— "He's your father isn't he?"

"Glad you finally figured it out, Lily.

"And yes. The Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher is my father. Benjamin Potter."

**YAY! My Birthday is tomorrow… so… give me a present and REVIEW! I was a good girl and updated really soon! I Love you guys!  
**


	9. A Change in Attitude

**A/N: Thanks to everyone who reviewed last chapter. It was an awesome birthday present! **** When I last checked, I had 23 reviews. That is a lot more than I expected at 8 chapters. So… THANK YOU!**

**So… here is the third chapter in one week… hope you're happy! **** But don't get used to it… The only reason this is happening is because it's Spring Break and I'm procrastinating doing my English Essay over **_**The Lord of the Flies...**_

**Chapter 9: A Change in Attitude**

"I cannot believe that I didn't see it before." I said, shaking my head. "You two look so alike."

"My mom has told me that all my life." He sounded a little frustrated.

"You okay?" I took a sip of my double-fudge sundae which we had both swirled into shakes. They're so much better when all you have to do is sip it.

"I'm just irritated. Everyone says that we look alike."

"Sorry," I apologized. "Do you not feel like you do? Or do you not want to?"

"I feel like everyone is expecting me to be exactly like him. It's like they want me to be a perfect clone of him or something. It's just so pressuring. I guess that's why I try so hard to be noticed for who I am. Not who everyone else wants me to be. Does that make sense?"

"Totally. My mom always liked me better than my sister, and my dad liked my sister better. He wanted me to be the perfect daughter, like her. Prom Queen, goes off to college, has a good job. That sort of thing. Then we found out that I was a witch. And so when my mom died, I was on my own. Meaning, most of the summer I would have to fend for myself because my dad thought I wasn't good enough for his attention, because I wasn't like Petunia." I sighed. "Then the summer before 6th year, my dad died. My sister didn't want to raise a sixteen-year-old, obviously, she was only 23, but she had to. So I'm stuck doing all of her chores over the summer. I escape to Kali's house for about half the break, which helps."

"That's cool. We help Sirius with his problems by letting him spend the entire summer with us. That way he doesn't have to stay with his family. Well, we're his family now." He sighed and took a sip out of his shake.

"So, _he_ doesn't want to live with his parents, or his parents don't want him?"

"Both, I guess. He hates them because they support Voldemort. And they hate him because he was in Gryffindor, and well, because he's… Sirius."

"If it was just that last one, I would agree with them." I joked and got a small smile out of James. "But I totally feel for him. I understand what he's going through. Kinda."

"I'll never be able to know what he's going through. It's frustrating knowing he's going through something I can't really help him with."

We walked in silence for a while; the only sound between us was the slurping of straws.

"All that really matters is that you do the best you can. My friends know that they can't change my sister's opinion of me, so they only help me by getting me away from her. I know that's all they can really do, and it comforts me." I told him softly. I've never really talked to anyone except my friends about my sister before, it felt good to tell someone else.

"Well, I guess that I'm doing all I can, now." He replied. Just as softly.

"In the end, that's all that matters."I laid a comforting hand on his arm.

"Thanks Lily." He gave me a sad smile. "You have no idea how much that means to me."

"I think I do."

"Really? How?"

"It's helped me too." I nudged him with my arm.

"Well, if that's how you're going to be," He scooped some ice cream out of his cup and I realized what he was going to do. It was too late though. I felt cold ice cream splatter all over my face.

I licked my lips. "Yum." I looked down at my own shake, not wanting to give it up. I soon decided that it would be worth it.

Sighing, I walked over to James, "Stay right there." Soon, I had no more ice cream, because it was all in James' hair. "Ooo Lookie! It's staying tamed!" I joked. It was true though. For the first time, that I'd ever seen, James Potter's hair was _flat_. "It must like me!"

"No, I think it like your ice cream better than you." He snickered, and I stuck my tongue out at him.

"I'm sad now." I divulged as we started walking again. We had washed the ice cream off of my face and out of his hair.

He suddenly looked as if he had done something wrong. "Why?"

"I don't have any chocolate now. Are you an idiot or something?" I teased.

"Want to finish mine?" he asked me, offering me what was left of his shake. He was obviously relieved.

"I was joking."

"Of course you were." A cold voice said, behind us.

"Snape," James growled, spinning around to glare at the greasy haired Slytherin.

"How do you do, Blood Traitor?" Snape snickered in mock politeness. "How's the girlfriend thing going Mudblood?"

"Don't you dare call her that!"

Suddenly I was a 16 year old. Memories were rushing back to me. Potter wasn't that nice generous, caring boy that I was just talking to. He was a cruel, mean, arrogant toe-rag. Severus wasn't that brutal and malicious Slytherin. He was my best friend

I was standing by the Black Lake, defending my best friend against that jack-ass; Potter, who had just hung him up by his feet.

The scene changed dramatically and I was standing in front of the Fat Lady. Sev was begging my forgiveness for something he did. I don't know what it was, but I wouldn't forgive him. I was being very nasty.

Then she was back in Hogsmede. Potter and Snape were centimeters from ripping each other's hair out. Quietly, so not to be noticed, I slipped away.

* * *

I found myself back on the balcony in the Head's dorm. All by myself, soaking in the view. Again.

I don't know why I ran. Maybe it was all those memories tumbling back into my mind. Memories that I haven't thought about for almost a year.

Those feelings of betrayal had come rushing back to me as soon as my mind returned to Hogsmede. I felt like I was alone again.

I held my knees to my chest as I rocked back and forth, watching stragglers coming back from a day of shopping and fun. Just think, twenty-four hours ago, I thought I would be one of them. Walking back, carrying some of the sacks of clothes that Sara bought that she didn't need. Talking with my best friends. Agreeing that the teachers are all jerks for giving us so much homework. Being a normal care-free witch.

Funny how fast your life can change.

Then stupid Andy had to ask me out. And stupid me _had _to agree. That turned out to be a disaster.

Then part of me was hoping I would be walking home with Potter. _James_ now, something in the back of my mind whispered to me.

Oh God. Could it be possible? Could I really, possibly, kind of fancy, _James Potter_? Why else would I enjoy spending time with him? Why else would I smile whenever he smiles, getting butterflies in my stomach in the process? I really am screwed up, I thought.

I've been back at school for just under two days and I've messed up my entire life. Well maybe not my _entire _life. I'm still pretty good at writing essays. Great comfort, right?

I sat there for at least an hour, until I fell asleep.

* * *

"Lily," someone called. I groaned, I was having a very nice nap. Very fun dreams too. There was a unicorn biting off Potter's head.

"Lily, you need to wake up." I remember that voice. It's the one from before. The smooth one. Totally awesomeness. But I want to sleep.

"Go 'way" I muttered, waving my hand to ward off anyone near me. I hit something hard.

"OW!" the guy screeched. "That bloody HURT!"

Groggily, I opened my eyes to see James Potter clutching his ear. "Go away, Potter," I reiterated.

"Come on Lily, you want to be out here when it rains?"

I shot to my feet. I hate being wet, unless I'm in the shower or tub. I looked up at the sky nervously, and sure enough, it looked as if it would rain soon. Cursing, I glared at James and stomped up to my bedroom.

"Why'd you run off?" He called to my retreating back.

"Because I felt like it!" I called back, grouchily.

"What made you so mad? Did I do something wrong?"

This time, I just ignored him.

* * *

**Even though I'm sure not all of you believe in the power of prayer, I would hope that everyone is doing all they can for the people of Japan. Whether it is donating time, money, or just praying for them. Please. I hope you're helping in any way you can.**

**I know it's pretty short, but I've been pretty busy with my birthday (family's been bothering me ****) and when I had free time, my internet was down so… Sorry! **

**Please R & R!**

**With Love,**

**Tark**


	10. Getting It Over

**A/N: I absolutely love you guys… you give me more reviews than I could ever imagine… Keep it up and I'll love you forever… **

**I also wrote an one-shot (which is why it took me so long to update. sorry!) I want you all to read it and review it! It's called: **_**The Magic of the Dancing Queen**_**.**

**Disclaimer: I would not be writing on this awesomeness if I were a world famous author… get it straight.**

**Chapter 10: Getting It Over**

* * *

I woke up to the pattering of rain on my window. I stood up and felt a rush of pain shoot through my legs. I was puzzled for a moment, then remembered that I needed to put that lotion on my legs every morning for a while. That is going to be a pain.

Hobbling over to my dresser, I grabbed the bottle and lathered it all over my ankles and lower legs. After feeling the pain disperse, I walked over the cushioned seat by my window that looked out over the lake.

It was sprinkling. I love watching the rain. I hated being in it, but I absolutely love watching the tiny droplets of water, falling from the heavens. Listening to the pitter-patter of little droplets splattering on the rooftops. It is utter bliss.

I stood up and picked my watch up off my nightstand. I cursed after seeing that it was a little after 6 in the morning. Sulking, I grabbed a book and went back to my window seat. Somehow though, I knew I wasn't going to be getting any reading done.

_James. _

Why did you have to go and change on me? I don't know what to think of you anymore! I stared out the window "Dammit, James," I mumbled. I looked around; making sure no one was around to hear me. I closed my eyes and held my head in my hands. What can I do? I can't just ignore everything going on inside me. These feelings are breaking out, and I don't know what to do with them.

I'll ignore him. That'll work. Only talk to him when it's absolutely necessary. Be a little fly, always just out of reach. Hmm. If that doesn't get the feelings to go away, nothing will. But that's just it. What if they _don't_go away? What will I do then?

I sighed. I'll figure out what I want to do when it comes to that. I looked down to see what book I'd picked up. Wuthering Heights. One of my least favorite books. Out of my favorite books, that is. Sighing again, I opened up to the first page and started reading.

I read for a while, immersing myself in the plot of the book, the maid was starting to tell her story. Suddenly I felt a ray of sunlight run across my face. I took it as a sign from God that everything was going to be okay. I will get over my feelings for James, and I can go on with my life.

I stood up and looked in my mirror. I looked absolutely terrible. My hair was a mess, I had bags under my eyes and don't even get me started on my skin.

After going in and taking a really long shower, I got dressed in a loose-fitting T-shirt and jeans, and put my hair up so that you couldn't tell that it was still a mess.

I walked out of my room, and into the common room. As I was in no hurry to get anywhere, I stopped and looked at some of the books around the room. Most of them were outdated textbooks about Magical Studies. I did find a section in a corner dedicated to Muggle Classics. Poetry, Shakespeare, the works.

I heard a noise come from James' room. It was a soft thump. He probably just got out of bed. Reasonable. Maybe. It's not even 7:00 in the morning on a Sunday. Maybe he's an early riser? I don't know, he doesn't seem like the type. And I don't want to stick around to find out. With that, I exited the common room.

* * *

"The Deathly Hallows." I told the Fat Lady with a smile.

"What are you doing up at this hour young lady?"

"It's 7:00! That's not early!" I hesitated. "Is it?"

"My dear, I was just joking with you." That is one messed up portrait. She's joking at 7:00 in the morning? I don't sleep in really late like some people, but that is still waaaaaay too early to be joking.

Glaring at the woman, I walked through, into the common room. The first thing I noticed was Kali sitting on a comfy couch, doing homework.

"Kali, did you stay up all night?" I asked her, in mock sternness.

"No, Lily. That's you remember?" She sighed. "I was just finishing up that essay that for Transfiguration. Why would someone give us an essay on the first day of school? That's just wrong."

"It's McGonagall, what do you expect?" Kali is just about as devoted to her school-work as I am. She's just into different things. She wants to be a healer, so she needs different classes than me.

"True. So true." I walked over and plopped down on the couch beside her. "What are you doing us so early?" she asked me.

"Rain woke me up." I replied, attempting to avoid the topic that had been on my mind all afternoon.

James stupid Potter. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you!

Gah. That took a lot of energy out of me. Inner ranting sucks it right up. I sighed.

"Lily? Did you hear me?"

"Huh?"

"I asked if you're feeling better. You said that you felt sick yesterday, and then you didn't show up for dinner last night. When we asked Potter about you, he said you hadn't come out of your room since he'd come back."

"Yeah, I feel better. I'd had a queasy stomach all day. Must've eaten something at breakfast that upset it." I paused. "But, it was nothing a good night's sleep couldn't fix." I smiled at her.

"A good night's sleep, cut short by rain?"

"Yeah, why?"

"Oh, nothing."

Doesn't sound like nothing, I thought. It sounds like a interrogation.

"So, did you guys enjoy the rest of your day?"

"Yeah, except that Sara kept complaining about she broke her nail while punching Andy."

"She is such a girly-girl." Someone behind us yawned really loudly.

"Who's a girly-girl? Is it one of those Ravenclaw bitches? If so, then I totally agree." Sara said, wiping the sleep out of her eyes.

"Yes, Sara, it's one of the Ravenclaw bitches." Kali and I shared a knowing look.

Sara seemed to believe this. She shrugged and sat down in between Kali and me and put her head in my lap. "I'm so tired it's not even funny."

"Why? You're usually the first one to zone out after Hogsmede weekends."

"I don't know. I went to bed at, what?" She looked at Kali for confirmation, "Eight?"

"Yeah, somewhere around there. But, when I woke up, you were tossing and turning like you were having a bad dream. When I walked by, you calmed down. I don't know about you, but when I have a bad dream, it makes me really tired."

"That's probably it." Sara said with her eyes closed. She yawned again, before falling asleep.

"Great." I muttered. "Not only am I super hungry, but I also have a sleeping Best Friend on my lap." I glared at the back of Sara's head before sighing. I looked over at Kali, whose shoulders where shaking from the effort of restraining her laughter. I turned my glare on her. "Go ahead, laugh." I growled. "Be happy you're not in my situation."

"do you want me to go and get you something to eat?"

"No, I want you to get Sara off my lap."

Kali poked Sara "She looks like she's out cold." She snorted. "I suggest, that if you really want her off of you, that you just push her off."

"I don't' want to hurt her!"

"That's the chance you're going to have to take."

"Geez, Kali! I never knew you were so evil!" She raised her eyebrows at me. "Okay, I knew you were evil. I just never knew you were so evil to us!"

"You know you love me!" she laughed.

"I wouldn't be so sure about that," I joked.

"Who's the evil one now?" she asked in mock hurt.

We both laughed, and sat in companionable silence. Me, with Sara on my lap, and her smiling shaking her head at Sara.

I sighed. "maybe we really should get her off."

"Yeah,"

We both looked at each other with mischievous smiles.

"1"

We situated our hands underneath Sara.

"2"

We braced ourselves to run for it, if necessary.

"3"

We pushed her. She laid there, still. I poked her behind her left ear. She waved my hand away, but stayed sleeping. I looked over at Kali, and we both shrugged.

"So," I said, smirking. "Any idea about what's for breakfast?"

* * *

We were walking slowly, wasting time. Neither of us wanted to get to breakfast too early. We just talked, took random turns, got lost, figured out where we were, got lost again. The cycle continued.

"Lil's?"

"Yeah?"

"Have you ever wondered what it would be like to show everyone else how good we are?"

"We do every day. We don't break rules. We don't insult people. And we do our homework. What else can we do to show people how good we are?"

"You know what I mean." What? What does she mean? I have no idea wha— Music. She's talking about music. Over the summer, the four of us have a lot of fun, mess around. We sing our favorite songs, make up new dances. Everyone who's ever seen us says we're really good. And that's including Kali's sister, who is a student at Julliard, a school based on the arts.

"Yeah, I do."

"Know what I mean, or wonder?"

"Both, I guess." I sighed. "We'll get the chance this year."

"You said that last year."

"But I really mean it this year. There's a perfect opportunity."

She looked intrigued. "What is it? If it's a party, I'm not going. I hate those things."

"Ditto," I laughed. "But really, there's going to be a talent show this year."

"Really? Who's planning it?"

I smirked at her. "Me."

"Ooooo, interesante."

"Really Kali? Spanish? Aren't you French?"

"Fine then; intéressant."

"You're hilarious, you know that right?"

"I know." She smiled at me. "When is it?"

"We haven't figured that out yet."

"We?" I hesitated, making sure I didn't accidentally call him James again. It's okay, (maybe) if I call him James in my head, but in front of my best friends, who think that I still hate him? Yikes, not a good idea.

"Potter and I."

"When did he come into the picture?"

"Since he came up with the idea, and is my partner on the project?"

"Okay, that makes me feel a little better, I guess. If you were falling for him, on the other hand, that would be a different matter, entirely." Holy shit. Does she suspect me? If she does, I'm dead. Kali hates it when we keep secrets from each other. I gulped, silently. I hope.

"Where did that come from?"

"Oh, nothing."

We walked in silence for a while. It was kinda awkward. Each of us were avoiding each other's eyes, yet were trying to see what the other was thinking.

"Well, what we have decided, is that each dormitory can have one team. And in the first round, each team can sing three songs. By the way, it's only vocal talent. Sorry, you can't play you're violin."

"My violin doesn't like you now."

"Well, your violin can suck it."

"Hey, don't dis the violin!"

"Sorry Kali's violin."

"You better be." We both laughed. "Look, we're at the Great Hall!"

"And I could not see the huge doors that were in front of my face." I snorted. "Thank you for my daily dose of obvious, Kali."She glared at me. "What?" I asked, laughing and grinning like a madwoman.

"Nothing," she said, as she let a smile ease onto her features.

I linked my arm in hers, and steered her towards the Gryffindor table. We sat down around the center of the table, facing the Hufflepuffs. I didn't feel like looking at any Ravenclaws or Slytherins right now.

I grabbed a muffin, and started to put butter on it, when I felt eyes boring into me. Looking around, I saw no one. Shrugging, I went back to my muffin.

"Lily? Are you okay?" Kali looked at me with a worried look.

"Yeah, why wouldn't I be?"

"You seem distracted, is all." Maybe it's because my love life has turned from non-existent, to super complex in 3 days.

I sighed. "I'm fine Kals," She didn't look like she believed me. "Really, I am. I had a bad summer, and I haven't had a lot of sleep."

"Why?"

"Thursday it was because of my legs. Friday it was because of you sleeping over. And last night it was because of James— " Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. SHIT! I dropped my head to the table. My life is over. Forever and ever and ever!

"What?" She shrieked. "What did you just say?"

"I couldn't get to sleep last night because of Potter?"

"No, you said James. Now, there are two things wrong with this picture. One; you never, _EVER_, call him James. And two; why the hell did he prevent you from sleeping?" She raised her eyebrows and crossed her arms. I could tell that she was pissed. Another thing about Kali, never, ever make her mad. She holds grudges forever.

"Yeah," a cool voice behind me said, "I'd like to know too."

**I know you probably all hate me for taking so long to update… (A month I think) But life has been hectic… and I'm an avid procrastinator… (Ask any of my friends… I'm 3 weeks {at least} behind in Bio… ) **

**Reviews make me want to update sooner though… if you catch my drift… Thanks to everyone who reviewed last chapter… you guys are AWESOME! Especially the ones who review **_**every **_**chapter…**

**Oh, And…**

**¡Ay, mi tobillo me duele! Tengo un esguince de primer grado. Se siente como alguien que golpeó muy duro. Estoy triste ahora. No creo que pueda hacer un seguimiento durante un tiempo. Espero que sea mejor para el jueves sin embargo.**

**I love Google Translate…**

**I loves you all lots too… While you review… **

**('''\ (;…;) /''')**

**Tark**

**P.S. I'm sorry, it's kinda short. I just felt really bad about not posting in a while, so I put what I had so far up. Don't kill me.**


	11. An Unexpected Expression of Love

**A/N: I was kind of surprised that when I uploaded my last chapter a six in the morning, that I had a review five minutes later… Thanks to Cookies and Cream1234567 for being the first person to review the 10****th**** chapter of this story… You're so awesome that I'll dedicate this chapter to you! And to everyone else who's reviewed… you're the best! **

**And to everyone who reviewed and tried to guess who was talking, there at the end… none of you got it right… **

**And against popular belief… I'm not dead… I know you're all terribly disappointed… Although, my high School teachers might be trying to kill me.**

**Disclaimer: I am not as awesomeness author; therefore, I am not J.K. Rowling… **

**Chapter 11: An Unexpected Expression of Love**

* * *

"_I'd like to know too."_

I whipped around. My heart dropped. "Andy." I breathed.

He smiled at Kali, ignoring me. "Hey, Kali, what's up?"

"Nothing, just trying to ignore your idiotic face." She glared at him.

"I was just wondering what all the shrieking was about." I'm sure I turned a nice shade of crimson, "So, I came over, and heard you say the same thing you said yesterday, Evans." He finally acknowledged my existence.

"Wait, what? She said it yesterday too?"

"Yeah."

"And she hasn't told us anything about it. That's not rude."

"Will you two stop talking as if I'm not even here?" I was sitting with my head in my hands. I could feel the tears coming on; ready to escape from my eyes. "I am a human being you know." Come on. I have to be strong. I can't let them see weakness. Weakness is a sign that I can't take care of myself. Which I can. Yes. I _can_ take care of myself. I think

The look in Andy's eyes darkened, "You think that you can insult me, and just walk away?" He snarled at me.

"When did I ever insult you?" I was no longer upset, no more fear of the tears escaping. I was _pissed_.

"Hmmm, let me think about it. Yesterday?"

"How is defending myself, insulting you?" I glared at him. "Because really—"

"What, the hell, is going on here?"

Remus. Thank. God. I could kiss him right now.

"Nothing, Lupin, stop poking your nose where it isn't wanted." Andy growled at him.

"Hey Remus. Would you like to join me in giving him a detention?"

"Sure." He smiled at me, and then frowned. "What are we giving him a detention for again?"

"Insulting, attacking, and refusing to follow the direction of the Head Girl." I stated.

"Sounds like a good reason."

"How about we give him to Filch for, let's say, 4 hours?"

"You really are evil Lily,"

Andy must have finally realized what we were talking about because: "You can't do that to me! I'm a Prefect!"

"Not much of a Prefect if you won't do what the Head Girl says, are you?" Remus countered.

Kali, who had been surprisingly quiet in the whole ordeal, since Remus joined us, spoke up. "Then there's the fact that he ran away crying when _a girl_ punched him in the face yesterday."

"I do not cry! All three of you are pathetic! You think that just because you have power given to you by the teachers, you can terrorize the school!"

He did not just insult my trustworthiness. No, he didn't. "If we terrorize the school, then what do you do? You who flaunts your badge in everyone's faces whenever you walk by. You, who walk around like you own the place. You, who expects the girls to fall at your feet, just because you have power." I seethed. "No, it's you who are pathetic. Now get out of my sight!" With every word I said, his livid expression deteriorated.

"Just a few days ago, you were using those taunts on Potter. Oh, how have the times changed."

I stepped up to him so that our noses were inches apart. "I have two things to say to you. 1. You have a six hour detention with Filch this coming Friday night. And 2. You can go to Hell."

I strode out of the Great hall, the eyes of all its occupants following me, every step of the way.

* * *

"Gah! Boys are so annoying!" I screamed when I walked into the 7th year Gryffindor Girls dormitory.

Alice peeked out of the bathroom. "Lils? You okay?"

"Do I look like I'm okay?" I plopped down on her bed, and buried my head in the pillow. I screamed as loud as I could.

"Why are all boys so difficult?" I asked after I had screamed myself hoarse.

"I've learned to ignore what most of the opposite sex says to me. It's done wonders for my sanity." She smirked at me. "You could use that tip…"

"Are you saying I'm insane?" I said, raising my eyebrows at her.

"Uh, Thursday, you pushed me out of a carriage, while it was raining…" She trailed off.

"And?" I prompted.

"That isn't something a normal person would do."

"Then Sara isn't normal either." I pouted.

"Has she pushed her best friend off a carriage in the pouring rain?" She looked at me skeptically.

I thought for a moment, racking my memory in attempt to find a good case. "Yeah." I smirked. "Remember Fourth Year?"

"When we kept bugging her about her vacation in Australia!" We both burst out laughing.

"Wasn't that the year she had sex with that cowboy who was, like, twice her age?"

Alice pretended that she had a cowboy hat on. "Howdy Par'ner! I'm from Aus'ralia!"

This made us laugh all the harder.

* * *

"Thanks Al," I said, smiling at her. That had helped me a lot. That's why I love Alice so much. She's good at cheering me up.

"For what?"

"This." I said, gesturing to the room in general.

"For cheering you up and having fun in the process?"

"Yeah, I guess."

"Okay. Now, what happened to make you so upset?"

"Just the fact that Andy's an asshole." I shrugged my shoulders.

"What did he do this time?"

"He's only a rude, stereotypical jerk." I said, disheartened.

"Can I beat him up?"

She had perked up at the thought of the opportunity to beat the crap out of a guy. "Al, no." I said, "As Head Girl, I cannot allow you to kill him, maim him, or harm him in any way." I took my badge off and threw it on my old bed. "As your friend, I want to kick his ass."

"You're starting to sound like Sara." She smiled at me.

I walked over to the window. I looked over the grounds, seeing some first years enjoying the sun. "I hate this." I said as I glared at the sun.

"You hate what?"

"The fact that this is supposed to be the best year ever and I've had the worst, what? Five days? Ever!"

"Not true." She consoled. "I've seen you in worse condition."

"When?" I said, as tears started to fall down my face. "When have I ever been attacked, had my legs blown to bits, had a relationship last less than 24 hours. And let's just throw in having Potter for a partner, for the heck of it! Tell me, for God's sake Al!"

I slumped back against the wall. Why did this have to happen to me? Why did Andy have to start noticing me _now_? Why did I have to start noticing _James, now_? My life is so screwed up right now, it ain't even funny. I just hope my grades stay afloat, unlike what happened when my mom died.

When my mom died. _That's_ what she's talking about. I never thought that Al was heartless enough to talk about her. My mom and I were really close after I got my Hogwarts letter. After my sister started to hate me, that is. It was really hard on me when she died. I crawled into a little hole. I barely ate. I slept all the time. I lost so much weight, my friends literally force fed me. Not my brightest shining moment, I'll admit.

_Elevator buttons and morning air,  
Strangers silence makes me wanna take the stairs.  
If you were here we'd laugh about their vacant stares,  
but right now my time is theirs.  
Seems like there's always someone who disapproves.  
They'll judge it like they know about me and you  
and the verdict comes from those with nothing else to do  
the jury's out, but my choice is you._

_So don't you worry your pretty little mind,_  
_People throw rocks at things that shine_  
_and life makes love look hard._  
_The stakes are high, the water's rough_  
_But this love is ours._

_They never know what people have up their sleeves,_  
_Ghosts from your past gonna jump out at me._  
_Lurking in the shadows with their lip gloss smiles,_  
_But I don't care._  
_Cause right now you're mine._  
_And you'll say_

_don't you worry your pretty little mind,_  
_People throw rocks at things that shine_  
_and life makes love look hard._  
_The stakes are high, the water's rough_  
_But this love is ours._

_And it's not theirs to speculate if it's wrong and_  
_your hands are tough but they are where mine belong in._  
_I'll fight their doubt and give you faith with this song for you._

_Cause I love the gap between your teeth_  
_and I love the riddles that you speak._  
_And any snide remarks from my father about your tattoos will be ignored_  
_Cause my heart is yours._

_So don't your worry your pretty little mind,_  
_People throw rocks at things that shine_  
_And life makes love look hard._  
_Don't worry your pretty little mind,_  
_People throw rocks at things that shine_  
_But they can't take what's ours_  
_They can't take what's ours_  
_The stakes are high, the water's rough_  
_But this love is ours_

Alice had been standing in the middle of the room for the entire song. She looked like she was right where she wanted to be. She was smiling one of the biggest smiles I've ever seen.

"Al," I said, looking at her. She snapped out of her state of ecstasy and looked at me.

"Thanks" I said, walking over and hugging her. She hugged me back.

"No problem. You're my sister. When you're sad, I'm sad. When you're pissed off, I'm pissed off. So, if I want to be happy again, I have to get you happy again."

"Part of me has the feeling that that song wasn't completely about me." I raised my eyebrows at her. If she has a crush, I want to know about it. Which means I would have to tell her about Potter. GAH! Life sucks!

"Part of me has the feeling that you're right." She snickered.

"Who! I gotta know! Come on! Tell me!" I begged.

"Oh, come on! You can do better than that!"

"What if I tell you who I'm crushing on?" I tempted.

"Oh yeah right. You, who has only ever had one crush in your entire life, is crushing on you. Less than a day after your previous crush broke your heart. Totally believable." She glared at me.

"Technically— "

"Oh, don't give me that shit!"

"I was going to say, that I started liking him BEFORE Andy asked me out on Friday. So _technically_, I didn't get a new crush right after my previous one broke my heart."

"Honestly? You've liked this dude since before Friday?"

"Yeah, looking back on it. I only admitted it to myself this morning." I let my shoulders slump. This was going to be A LOT harder than admitting that I liked Andy. I mean, who would fall in love with the guy she's hated for over 6 years? Oh, right. Me.

"Dang girl. If _you _don't admit it to yourself, this guy must be…" She hesitated, looking for a word. I bit my lip, hoping beyond relief that she couldn't tell it was him. "Awkward?"

"You could say that." I looked down at my feet, knowing that my face was covered in a red blush. Damn being a redhead. I'm so pale that blush shows up really easily.

"Lily," Alice consoled, hugging me."You don't have to tell me now. Sara will probably make you tell her, and then she'll tell me."

"I know. But it will be easier to tell you first though." I tried to smile and hug her back. I didn't work too well.

"Why?"

"You won't judge me."

She pulled away and held me at arm's length. She held my shoulders tightly, looking into my eyes. "Why would I judge you? Why would anyone judge you? You can't help who you fall in love with. Love is just another part of life. It's one of those things that you find in the most unexpected places." She smiled sincerely.

"Everyone would judge me because…" I took a deep breath.

"Because I think I might like, and I mean that in the most tentative way possible, I might like, umm, Potter."

"As in James Potter? The guy you've despised for the past six years?"

"Yeah, the one and only."

**I know that **_**Ours**_** is usually thought of as a Love Song, but when I first heard it, it sounded like a friend one so… HA!**

**Thanks again to everyone who reviewed last chapter… **

**1. Cookies and Cream1234567**

**2. Loslote**

**3. Sellesia-Smile**

**4. SiriusBlackisSeriuslyfunny333**

**5. AliLuvsAlli-Sirius**

**6. Music**

**7. Kujo**

**I'm hoping to get another chapter done by the end of the school year (June 3****rd**** for me), I don't think it'll happen, but, one can try, right?**


	12. Realizations

**A/N: I'm back! And better than ever! Not… Well, I didn't get it done before school got out… BUT! (There's always a but!) It was out of my control! 'La computadora de mi madre' (I love Spanish!) broke… I KNOW! It was absolute torture… not being able to read, wait! I mean WRITE fanfiction… Well, she had to send it in to get fixed, and then, THEY FORGOT TO PUT INTERNET BACK ON IT! So I couldn't put the chapter online… but it's all better now, so I hope to update A LOT more often…**

**I love you guys so much… Please Review… **

**Disclaimer: Do I look awesome? Oh, wait… you can't see me… I'll save you the horror… I'm not awesome, nor do I look it… Therefore, I AM NOT J.K. ROWLING! Love you!**

**Chapter 12: Realizations**

* * *

Dearest and most pleasurable diary…

First of all, I want to get this out there. I DO NOT TALK TO MYSELF! A First Year Hufflepuff just came up to me and asked me if I talk to myself. Stupid little eleven year old.

Wait, is writing in a diary considered talking to myself? Now that little hufflepuff has gotten me thinking I'm insane! I'm going to give her a detention next time I see her. Ugh.

After those first few extremely hectic days, the rest of September flew by like hell was chasing after it. Not a lot happened over the course of the month.

The first thing was that I proceeded to ignore James, the seducer, Potter unless I was required to talk to him, Head Duties and such. We continued our work on the talent show. We had a few requirements:

1.) Only 1 team per dormitory

2.) Only students Year 5 and up can participate (we changed it, as it would take way too long for that many kids.)

3.) Only vocal acts

4.) You must have at least 1 song with all the members, and at least 1 solo song (aka, a minimum of 2 songs.)

5.) A limit to 3 songs per group

6.) All songs must be approved by either the Head Boy or Girl

7.) No vulgar or inappropriate moves or songs

As I said, very few. NOT! He insists on having all these rules! I hate it!

The second; Alice, sweet dear Alice, confessed her dying love of Frank Longbottom (who dorms with the Marauders) to me, that dreadful Sunday September 4th.

_~Flashback~_

"_Frank!" I called. "Hey! Frank, wait up!" He turned and smiled at me._

"_Oh, hey Lily. How are you doing?"_

"Good. Yourself?"

"_Okay."_

"_So," I asked him, "Are you crushing on anyone?"_

_He blushed "Why do you ask? Because, Lily, I think of you as a sister."_

"_It's not about me, you dimwit. Please, will you tell me who you like? I promise I won't tell anyone!"_

"_Why do you want to know?"_

"_Because one of my friends kinda likes you… so…"_

"_Is it, maybe, possibly, Alice?"_

"_I have no idea what you're talking about." I said sweetly._

"_Really?"_

"_Sure, why not?"_

_~End of Flashback~_

Needless to say, they are dating now.

The last thing that happened was; Sara got on the Gryffindor Quidditch team! HELL YEAH! We're all so proud of her. Although, I kinda feel sorry for her. She has to deal with Black harassing her 3 times a week. But, she deserves it, for being so athletic.

Oh, and I almost forgot. Rudolf? Remember him? Yeah. He got expelled. That was the single best day of my life… Yep. The good little Lily Evans is taking pleasure in another student being suspended.

I know. The world is going to end. Oh well. At least then I don't have to deal with ignoring James in hope that my feelings for him will go away. I honestly hope they will, because then I wouldn't have to worry about my feelings getting out. Then the gossip chain that is Hogwarts (Because, really that is what it really is, no one really cares about the magic. They only care about the gossip.) And then I'll be soooo embarrassed and be forced to go into exile. Yep. That is what would happen.

Maybe.

Well, I have to go.

* * *

I had been slowly walking to History of Magic in the first week of October when I heard someone walk up behind me. Which was weird, because I use a long way that is very out of the way. I've never seen anyone else use it.

"Hey Evans, can I talk to you?"

"What do you want, Black?"

"I have a first name you know."

"What do you want, _Sirius_?"

"What the hell is your problem?"

"Excuse me?"

"You lead Prongs on, and then you suddenly ignore him, Evans. You're a bitch, and an idiot."

"_I'm_ an idiot?" I walked up to him. "You're the one who refuses to accept your feelings for Sara. Oh, and by the way, I have a first name too!"

"Have you looked at yourself in the mirror lately, _Lily_?" We were inches away from each other now. I could feel his breath on my nose, he _was_ taller than me. I stepped back, needing some space.

"Sirius, the reason I'm not talking to James," I heard him snort at my use of his best friend's first name. I ignored him. "The reason I'm not talking to James is because — because I have accepted my feelings."

He just stared at me in shock. I turned and walked away. "Oh, and Sirius? If a single word of this gets out, I will let the whole school know about your little crush on Sara." I said without turning around.

He was still standing in the same spot when I turned a corner.

* * *

That little 'discussion' with Sirius Black was like a slap in the face. I mean, how would you react if the best friend of the guy you like came and started yelling at you? All those romance books where they talk about having those 'rude-awakening,' I guess this is mine.

I was sitting in the library doing my Transfiguration homework about a week after the 'incident' with Sirius, as I'd so named it. Someone came in and sat down in the seat right next to mine, interrupting my internal monolog.

"Hey Evans." I looked over and saw James staring at me.

"I, uhm, I gotta go—" I started to stand up.

"Oh, no you don't." He grabbed my wrist and pulled me back down. "You're going to sit here, and tell me, why the hell you've been ignoring me for the past month." He looked at me expectantly. I looked behind him and saw Madam Pince glaring at us.

"The librarian is glaring at us. Can we just go back to the Dorm to talk?"

"Why? Is it that bad?"

"Yes." I stated simply. I got up and walked out of the Library. I did not want a public audience when I told him. I mean, I could barely tell Alice or Sirius when I was alone with either of them. How the hell am I gonna tell the guy I like that, well, I like him, in a room full of people? This is going to be a lot harder than I had previously hoped.

After walking through the doors to the library, I made an impromptu decision; I walked into an abandoned classroom across the hallway. I needed to think, before I went and did something completely stupid, and utterly embarrassed myself.

UGH! Why did I have to fall for HIM? He's James fucking Potter for crying out loud!

"Shit," I heard someone out in the hallway mutter. Casting a one-way glass spell on the door, I saw James franticly looking around, "Damnit! I lost her." It took all my willpower no to snigger at this. You'll always lose me you arrogant toe-rag! Hmmm, now I'm slipping into old territory with him. I don't know which one I liked better…

"James? Is that you?" I heard a prissy voice call from down the hall. James' face brightened slightly at the sound. Who the hell could that be?

"Oh, Rose." I could tell that he was still upset. He deserved it. I think. "How've you been? I haven't seen you in what? Two hours?"

Rose Harper came into view. With her platinum blonde hair, and green/gold eyes, she was very… popular with the guys at Hogwarts. She was otherwise known as; The School Slut, and The Queen Gossip. She made me, with my unruly mass of Red hair, freckles and green eyes look hideous. She made most of the girls in the school _feel_ hideous. The only one in the school considered more beautiful than Rose is Sara. Sara, with her light green eyes and perfect complexion, has a natural beauty that Rose will never have.

"Three. I've missed you." The slut, I love that nickname for her, it's so fitting, reached up and pulled James down to kiss him. I gagged silently as the couple was lip-locked for quite a few minutes. I was just waiting, hoping really, for someone to walk out of the library and see the two right there, and spread a rumor about it. It would just make my day. Maybe.

Seeing them like that gave me an unfamiliar feeling in the bottom of my stomach. It was like something inside me was getting ripped apart. I think I'm jealous. Not only of the fact that it's her out there kissing James, but because of what they have together. The fact that no matter what happens to you during school, you'll always have someone willing to snog you senseless, is well, appealing.

"James," Rose breathed as the two broke apart. "Who did you lose? I mean, right before I walked up."

"I was looking for Lily, we needed to have a Head Meeting."

"Liar," I whispered, before I realized what I was doing. Quickly, I clamped a hand over my mouth. Luckily, it seemed like neither of them heard me.

"So, you were looking for her? To have a Head Meeting? And you were cussing because you couldn't find her?" Maybe I like this girl after all. She's putting James right on the spot.

"We have a deadline coming up in the next few days. We really have to figure some things out." LIAR! Our next deadline isn't for another two weeks!

"Okay, I believe you. It just makes me mad that you have to spend so much time with that whore." When was the last time you looked in the mirror, Bitch? With the amount of make-up you have on, I wouldn't be surprised if you haven't taken any off in the past three years.

"Don't call her that. It's not like either one of us enjoys each other's company." Then why the hell did you ask me why I was mad at you? You're giving me mixed signals here, James Potter! "I only tolerate her presence because I have to. I'd get my badge taken away otherwise."

"And would that be such a bad thing? I mean, really, who cares that you're Head Boy? Everyone listens to you just as much now, as they did last year when you were just Quidditch Captain." Yeah, listen to your little girlfriend! I don't want to have to talk to you at all! And would you two just go away? I'm trying to leave so I can get some work done!

"Rose, this means a lot to me. I feel like I'm actually making a difference. All those years I spent making fun and teasing other kids, I felt like I needed to prove something. I needed to prove that I wasn't just like my dad. Now, I feel like to prove that I'm not like him; I have to be better than him. In _everything_ that I do. _Everything._ Quidditch, music, classes, standing, social status. _Everything. _I hope you realize that." He sighed deeply, grabbed her hand and dragged her away.

Did I just hear what I thought I just heard?

* * *

"Lily! Come on! We're going to be late to dinner!" I was currently sitting in my Heads Dorm later that day, writing an essay for Potions. Well, I was _trying_ to write any essay for Potions. Alice, Kali, and Sara were buzzing around the room. Well, Kali was reading one of the many Wizard history books stacked on the shelves around the room and Alice and Sara were buzzing around.

It was Sara who had interrupted my writing this time. I looked up to see Kali with her eyebrows elevated, Alice looking positively bored, and Sara glaring at me. Sighing dramatically, I very slowly picked up my stuff, taking extra care to dry off my essay so that it didn't smear. I closed my ink bottle in 3 times the amount of time it normally takes and I did the whole thing whistling softly. I knew it was complete agony for Sara to be late for dinner. Especially since she had an extremely small lunch due to a stomach ache.

"Now you're just being mean Lils. Stop taking so long." She narrowed her eyes at me.

"I have absolutely no idea what you're talking about, Sar!" I laughed. I was toying with her now.

Thinking back on previous events of the day, I lost all energy to play with Sara. "Lil? Are you okay?" She sat down next to me on the couch. I looked up at her through the tears that unwillingly brought themselves into my eyes. Slowly, I shook my head, no. She put her arm around me a rested my head on her shoulder. "What's going on?" She asked me as she pressed a kiss into my hair.

"Is this about James?" Alice asked, dear sweet Alice. Is this about James? Or is this about everything that I heard today?

"I—I don't know." I whispered, barely audible, even to me. I was amazed that all three of them heard me.

"I'm lost, how did James come into this?" Sara asked me and Alice at the same time.

I looked at her, and I mean really looked at her, deep in her eyes. I hoped she saw the pain in my eyes that I saw in hers. She's hiding something too, but now's not the time to press that issue. "Lils, what's wrong? Do you like James? Is that what this is about?"

"I think—I think I might like him. But that's not all of it."

Sara jumped up in excitement. "It's about bloody time you took a fancy to the bloke!" she hugged me enthusiastically.

"Sara, I don't think she's done." Kali interrupted Sara's rants and hyper gyrations.

I could feel all three of them boring holes into my head. I wouldn't face them. I _couldn't_ face them. A sob escaped my lips. Kali knelt in front of me, and lifted my chin so that she was looking straight into my eyes. I tried to turn away, but she held strong. "Lily, you can tell us anything. You know that right? Anything you tell us, we won't judge you." I stayed silent for a long time. "If you don't trust us, fine, we'll leave."

"It's not something _I_ did." I muttered, frustrated. Why were they acting like I did something wrong? I closed my eyes and looked down. "It's Rose."

"As in Rose_ Harper?_" Sara sneered. "The Bitch who stole the only guy who I ever cared about?"

We all looked at her, she glared at Alice and Kali until they turned their attention back to me. "What about Rose?" Alice asked.

"She's James' girlfriend."

"Oh, holy mother of God." Sara swore. "That Bitch gets around doesn't she?"

"That's not even the worst part about it."

Slowly, I relinquished the entire story. From the encounter with Sirius (I left out the comments about Sara) to James' realization when it comes to his dad. They just sat there. Saying nothing, asking no questions.

After I was finished, we all sat in silence. Then suddenly we all started talking at once:

Kali: "Well, it sounds like James is acting like a total asshole right now."

Sara: "I think you were right to ignore that son of a bitch, Lils."

Alice: "I supposed this is all Rose's fault."

Me: "I'm hopeless when it comes to relationships."

Somehow, out of all that, we all only heard Alice's comment. "What do you mean, Al?" Kali asked her.

"I mean, it sounds to me, that if Rose hadn't come around and been such a bitch, you would've confessed your undying love to James, and you two would be together right now." She stated wisely.

"Alice, it's not as if they just got together right now, today. It seems like they've been together for a while." I muttered.

"No, Lils, Rose doesn't stay with guys for a while. She gets together with them for the sex, if they don't give it to her, or she gets bored (which happens often) she just moves on." I looked at her skeptically, remembering everything I'd seen today. "Listen to me. SHE. DOESN'T. HAVE. BOYFRIENDS. She has trends. They're in and out with the fashion. It won't be long until she dumps Potter on his ass where he belongs." She shook her head, as if to rid herself of unwanted thoughts, straightened her back and walked out of the Heads Dorm.]

"Why do I get the feeling that there's more to that girl than meets the eye?" Kali asked.

"Oh, I don't know what's going on inside her head. Part of me doesn't want to know. But the other part wants her to get it out of her, before she explodes." I said. "She's hurting inside, more than we could ever know. And she won't let us help her. I'm afraid she's going to dig herself into a hole that she won't be able to dig out of." I looked at my friends and saw the same looks of concern mirrored on their faces. This was going to be a long year. All I can do is hope to get through it with at least a small shred of sanity left.

* * *

**A/N: Thanks to everyone who reviewed last chapter… I think we had some newbies who'd never reviewed WLCFH (My new acronym for **_**When Love Comes From Hate**_**… so if you see it, know that that's what I'm talking about ) before—Round of applause to you guys! (Thebiggestpotterfreak & InfectedWithNargles)**

**I'm DEEPLY sorry (Again… more apologies ) for not updating! You know my reasons!**

**I love you guys! Please, please, PLEASE REVIEW! I know that I haven't been a good updater, but I promise that I'll try harder!**


	13. Jesus Take the Wheel

**I'm so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so sorry about not updating. I'm probably the worst updater in the Fanfiction world. I can't say the world, because Christopher Paolini is worse, but he writes real stories, not fanfiction, so he doesn't count… by the way, has anyone read Inheritance yet? I just got done with it, IT'S AMAZING!**

**Anyways, I would still like to thank those of you who reviewed last chapter, all those months ago: Isabella XP, Kujo, Loslote, Book-Mania-Girl520, ****SiriusBlackisSeriuslyfunny333****, AliLuvsAlli-Sirius, and plaincrazysuckup. You guys are all amazing!**

**Disclaimer: Do you honestly think I'm JK Rowling, cause if you do, we need to have a little chit chat…**

**Sorry, on with the story. I wrote this while I was supposed to be doing all sorts of homework, who would've thunk it? Math giving me a stroke of genius? **

**Chapter 13: Jesus Take the Wheel**

I've always laughed at the girls in books who let the love of a man blind them from seeing the truth about who that man truly is. That also goes the other way; the hate of a man blinds the girl from seeing that he is really not so bad. In the past month, I've learned that both situations apply to me. I had such a huge crush on Andy that I looked past all the things that made him a horrible human being. He's a bully and he loves to put himself above others.

And James. Oh, dear James. The man that I've hated with a passion for over 6 years has become someone who, quite frankly, I feel like I'm falling in love with. He's no long a bullying toerag like he used to be. Like Andy for that matter. He's become a man who is kind to others, listens to what they have to say and actually gives his honest opinion. Which is a good skill when you're Head Boy. It also helps that he's gotten, if possible, even hotter over the summer. God, I love Quidd—

"Oh my god! KALI!" Sara screamed right behind me. I jumped and gingerly held my hands over my dying ears.

"What?" Kali glared at Sara. It was close to 10 and the only reason she's still awake is because Sara keeps yelling at her. The only reason I'm still here, is because Sara keeps complaining that I never spend any time with them anymore.

Sara grabbed my diary and started reading in a seductive voice; "The way his luscious, black hair falls in his deep, hazel eyes when he concentrates on his work is so sexy." She looked at Kali, deadpan. "She's started writing a diary."

"Ah, HELL NO!" She glared at me, "Do you not remember what happened with Jonny?"

Of course I remember what happened with Jonny. In Fifth Year, she started writing in a diary. She wrote everything in that diary. Mostly, though, it was full of her ranting about her current crush; Jonathan Farley. Sara had done something to piss off one of the Seventh Years, and she snuck down into our room while none of us where there, and started rifling through what she thought was Sara's stuff. But no, it was Alice's.

The next day it was all over the school that Sara King was in love with Jonathan Farley, a Sixth Year Hufflepuff with absolutely no backbone, no reason to stand out, and absolutely no chance of catching the attention of Sara King. Jonny wasn't used to the sudden attention. Everyone taunted him, saying that he was paying Sara, that he was using her as nothing more than a slut. Only we knew the truth, but we stayed silent. Watching as he slowly withered under the attention. His parents had to take him out of school, he hasn't been heard from since.

That time wasn't our best, and whenever it comes up, we're all so ashamed. But comparing this situation to that one is not cool. Anyone who reads my diary would realize that It's mine. Not Sara's, not Alice's, not Kali's. MINE! Because I keep it in MY dorm. Under a loose board in the floor, covered by a protection spell.

"I would prefer if you didn't bring that up." A muffled voice came from Alice's bed. She had her curtains closed and we had all assumed she was asleep.

"Sorry Al, did Sara wake you up?" Kali called across the room. Sara glared at Kali, who in return stuck her tongue out at Sara. Alice's face came out from the curtains a moment later.

"No, I never fell asleep, I was just thinking," She said as she jumped off her bed and padded over to Sara's where the three of us were seated. "About life, and how much I'm going to miss Hogwarts when this year is over."

We all sat quietly (for the first time in hours, thanks to Sara) and thought about what Alice said. It's true, I thought. Hogwarts has been my life for the past 7 years. I can't believe that its 7th year already. These past few years have gone by so fast. I grabbed Sara and Alice's hands.

"You know what? You're right Al; Hogwarts is more than just a school. Hogwarts is my home," I looked at my friends, _my sisters_, and rephrased. "Our home." I smiled at them. "But! It's only October! We have 9 months left until we have to worry about this crap. I'm going to bed."

"For 9 months?" Sara asked confused. The rest of us glanced at each other and laughed. "You know Lily; you're getting really good at changing the subject." She punched me lightly, "I completely forgot all about your diary."

"Good." I ducked as she swung a pillow at me. I grabbed it from her and swung it back at her.

"I'm getting out of this while I still have my dignity." But Sara grabbed the back of her shirt and swung her around for a better shot. Kali stood there for a second, shocked, before turning and glaring at Sara. "It's _on_, sweetheart!"

All four of us were in the thick of it, fighting it out with pillows. Thinking back on our previous conversation, I thought that this might be one of those perfect memories that I want to hold on to for the rest of my life. Grabbing my camera out of my trunk, I set it on a timer, and made sure the four of us were in its line of sight.

Looking at the polaroid later that night, I knew that this is a night to remember. I stuck it in the page of my diary Sara had been looking at earlier.

* * *

At about midnight, I went back to my dorm for bed. Yawning, I silently thanked Dumbledore for making me Head Girl so that I had extended curfew hours. I really should start getting more sleep. All this stuff with James on top of schoolwork _and _Head Girl business, I've been living on 4 to 5 hours of sleep a night. Not good on your body, let me tell you.

I yawned again, not noticing that there was someone right in front of me until I ran into them.

"Oh, I'm so sorr—" I started, but saw who it was, I stomped off in the direction of my common room.

"Lily, wait!" Andy grabbed my arm and swung me around so that I was facing him.

"_What_?" I snarled, my blood was boiling. "What the hell do you want?"

"I-I just wanted apologize." What? "I don't expect you to forgive me for what I did to you, but I want you to know that I'm sorry. Sorry for everything. For thinking that there was something between you and Potter, watching you over the past few months has proved that there clearly isn't. For comparing you to Potter. And finally, for everything that happened in Hogsmeade. You didn't deserve that. And I'm sorry."

"You're right. I'm not going to forgive you." I glared at him. "And you have the customary 2 hour detention with McGonagall for being up after curfew." I pursed my lips hoping that he would get the message and walk away. He didn't. "What the hell do you want now?" I asked irritably.

"Well," he hesitated. "I want you." And then he kissed me.

Suddenly I felt my insides dissolve. My whole body was melting into his. I put my arms around his neck, deepening the kiss. I played with his hair, lacing my fingers through it. I felt his hands go to my back pulling me towards him. His hands go up my shirt and onto my bare back.

Suddenly, someone coughed somewhere down the hall. We jumped apart. I looked down the hall to see James standing there, a parchment in his hands.

"West," he stated coldly, "Detention. Tomorrow. McGonagall. 2 hours." And he walked away without another word.

"I should go." I muttered, not really wanting to. "I need sleep. I-"

"I know, I should go too. Don't want Potter coming back and giving me another detention." He half –heartedly laughed. We both knew James _would_ give him another detention.

I stood up on the tips of my toes and pecked his lips. "Talk to you tomorrow then? At breakfast?" I asked, walked backwards down the hall, not wanting to let him out of my sight.

"Tomorrow it is." He smiled at me, turned, and soon he too was gone.

I sighed. What did I just do?

* * *

"What the hell was that?" I jumped. James was standing on the platform outside our rooms.

"Don't do that to a girl, James! You scared the living crap out of me!" I tried in vain to control my heartbeat. I don't know if it was racing because James scared me, or because of that whole thing with Andy, or because of the fact that James and I are actually have a conversation in which I don't feel the urge to run away.

"I reiterate. What the hell was that?" Now I could see the hurt look on his face. The pain so clearly etched in his features.

"What was what?" I asked, getting angry for reasons that honestly, I had no idea what they were.

"What was that thing with Andy. I thought you two were over, done, encima."

"Okay, 1, what does encima mean, and 2, why the hell are you so angry? You're acting as if I did something wrong. It's not like there's something going on between you and me, so you have absolutely no right to criticize me!"

"It means over, and I'm angry because the _Head Girl _was caught after hours making out in the _middle of a hallway_!" He snarled. "If that's not inappropriate, I don't know what is."

"You asshole." I spat out. "You criticize _me_ for making out in the middle of a hallway, what about yesterday, _you and Rose_, huh?" A look of shock flew across his face. "Oh yeah, I know all about that. And the fact that you're afraid that you're going to be just like your father. Guess what Potter, you're just like him, did you know that? You're just a younger version of him." He gave me a hurt look, turned around, went into his room and slammed his door closed.

He looked so hurt that I almost went up and apologized. I almost did, but I didn't. I know that comment about his father was low. But I didn't care. He hurt me, so I hurt him in return.

I sat down at the couch directly in front of the fire. "An eye for an eye," I muttered to the flames, trying to convince myself that what I did was okay. But nothing I could think of condoned what I had just done. But for some reason, I refused to accept that as a bad thing.

I should be thinking about Andy, not James. I don't know what whatever we did makes us, but whatever we are, I like it. Nothing serious, only fun. No commitments. No rules. Just, fun. I smiled, thinking how Un-Lily-Evans that would be. Because Lily Evans is _not _fun. Not in the least.

I thought about the time when someone first said I wasn't fun. I was 7 and it was raining. I hate being in the rain, so I was sitting by my window and watching all the other kids play in the playground right behind my house. One of my friends waved at me. I waved back, through the window. She had run up to my front door. And I had run down to meet her. She had asked why I wasn't out playing. And I had told her the truth, I didn't like the rain. She said I wasn't any fun at all, and she wasn't my friend anymore. And then she ran back outside. When I went crying to my mother, she had said this:

"Lily-bean, people always think that those who aren't like them aren't fun, and aren't cool. They think that just because you look different, act different, or even talk different, you aren't as good as them. You just have to be strong and be a better person. Do you understand me, sweetheart?"

A single tear fell down my cheek when I thought of my mother. She was so much stronger than I am. She always knew what to say to make everything okay. No matter what the situation. She was the best mother a girl could ask for. I wiped my eyes and for the first time in a long time, I bowed my head to pray "I'm sorry for the way I've been living my life, I know I've got to change, so from now on tonight, Jesus take the wheel, take it from my hands cause I can't do this on my own. I'm letting go, so give me one more chance, save me from this road I'm on." I sang the lyrics to the song, thinking of how much my mother loved to sing.

I laid my head down on the armrest, crying again, and fell asleep thinking about my mother.

* * *

**I know I already apologized, but it's been 4 months, I think I need to reiterate: I am honestly really sorry. My computer crashed and it hated me; but it's better now.**

**Happy belated Thanksgiving, and if I don't update before then, Merry Christmas!**


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